sexyredframe

in the pink

2010-09-01T11:29:00.002+02:00

happy spring day southern hemisphere!

A friend of mine is looking for some bridesmaid's dress inspiration. I posted grey and pink dresses at Threads... Let me know if you have any hot tips? xx

how can you hate on balloons?

2010-08-20T11:55:00.001+02:00

I know a lot of us (and by us I mean you!) have been spewing hateful words on wedding pictures with balloons / cupcakes / mustaches / vintage furniture in fields, but can I just show you one more little local wedding? Remember over here in Africa we're not all sitting on the internets all the time pouring over wedding porn, we're busy hunting and gathering and grooming and training our elephants to ride around on. So things that may be old and over over there, can still be good and clean and fresh (tra-la-la) over here. Whatever, I'll let the pictures speak for themselves, they are so much more eloquent.

Girl has a lovely blog.

Photographers are pretty awesome.

have you seen her?

2010-08-20T07:58:00.001+02:00

The little sunbather on the promenade

She has a friend, a dragonfly

But I like the little sunbather best

This is exactly how I feel, when the sun is out

I would like to bring her home to live with me

Installation art by Marieke Prinsloo Rowe

who doesn't like a bit of tmi first thing in the morning?

2010-08-19T08:45:00.002+02:00

While the blogger's block has had me firmly locked in it's jaws...
And about a hundred years ago, Tenille of Nine Years in the Making tagged me, and I meant to respond, really I did.

Tenille said:
This is kind of like the 25 things - except there are pre-decided questions and it's about you and your spouse, not just you. Come on, play along - inquiring minds want to know! ;-)

♥ What are your middle names?
Neither of us have any... Thanks parents!

♥ How long have you been together?
Very nearly three years now. (Crikey time is FLYING by!)

♥ How long did you know each other before you started dating?
Three months.

♥ Who asked who out?
It started with us seeking each other out at parties of our mutual friends... Then I invited him and a few other friends (for cover - I just wanted to see him!) out, we ended being the last two at the bar and he sweetly, yet confidently, stated his interest. Aw.

♥ Whose siblings do you see the most?
Mine, in a social context. But we see his siblings and parents together a lot more, visiting as a family.

♥ Do you have any children?
No.
And that's all I have to say about that right now, lovely yet persistent Mother-in-law and aunt-in-law plying us with baby-makers!

♥ What about pets?
None. We travel for long periods of time, quite a bit. We go away for weekends, very often. We go out, all the time. I would like to have a little fishy or two though!

♥ Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
Lately, different social needs. I.e. I want to 'socialise' all the time and till late (who are you calling a lush?!) and he... doesn't. (Who are you calling a bore?!)
Not sure who changed? Think both of us, in opposite directions.
(Oops.)

♥ Did you go to the same school?
No.

♥ Are you from the same home town?
No.

♥ Who is the smartest?
Ha. Trick question!
Probably Werner, because he has language AND maths aptitude. But don't tell him I said that! We have scrabble death matches and are about even in trivia & general knowledge.
I rule at rock, paper, scissors though!

♥ Who is the most sensitive?
I am, by miles.

♥ Where do you eat out most as a couple?
Breakfast favourites like Liquorice&Lime in Kloof Street.

♥ Who has the craziest ex?
Haha, debatable. Fortunately, our exes don't really feature.
Unless you count the (numerous) girls in our extended circle of friends that he's snogged before?
Hi girls! (Refer: Question #26 below - no jealousy, for real.)

♥ Who has the worst temper?
Werner. No, don't you even dare try and argue!

♥ Who does the cooking?
The Chinese place around the corner.
(Pine Garden, Buitenkant Street: awesome Thai Red Curry!)
The Italian place next to the Chinese place.
(Narona: Delicious pastas and oddly, burgers!)
Beluga, Prestwich Street, Green Point: Blue Plate sushi special: heaven.
And then about twice a week, when I'm overtaken by guilt over my lack of culinary effort... I do. Kicking and screaming and cursing and producing lacklustre, though highly consumable atoms arranged in the guise of 'food'.
Werner makes all the coffee and strong, sweet, milky tea a girl could need, a mean breakfast and loves to swoop into the kitchen at the last possible moment of my cooking efforts to steal my 'thunder' by making things taste better, mostly through the vicious abuse of Wellington's Hot Sweet Chilli Sauce.

♥ Who is more social?
I thought he was, but that seems to have been a side-effect of bachelorhood. Now, it's definitely me. (Refer: Question #8 above, things that are hard.)

♥ Who is the neat-freak?
ME! Now go tidy your blog!

♥ Who is the more stubborn?
Werner.

♥ Who hogs the bed?
Werner. I was shocked and in awe the first time I woke up from an elbow in my eye. There was Werner, all stretched out diagonally across the bed, arms behind his head, king of his castle. I'm still shocked when awoken in this manner, but not so much in awe anymore...

♥ Who wakes up earlier?
Werner.

♥ Where was your first date?
Reuben's in Franschhoek. Brilliant food, super romantic ambience, surprise gifts... Very cheesy - perfect.

♥ Who has the bigger family?
Well, they are 6 kids. Who do you think?

♥ Do you get flowers often?
Not often, but in bucket-loads when I do!

♥ How do you spend the holidays?
Driving between his family's Stilbaai beach house, my family in George (Mom) & Langebaan (Dad) and ex-pat friends visiting in Cape Town. Luckily, I love driving.
(No, I don't, I fricking hate it.)

♥ Who is more jealous?
Neither.

♥ How long did it take to get serious?
Not very long at all. 18 July (express romantic interest in each other) till 28 August (asking me to 'be his girlfriend cause he didn't want me kissing other boys' till 27 October (engaged!) Aw again.

♥ Who eats more?
Well. Surprisingly, and quite possibly against all laws of physics, metabolics and/or biology, we share most meals 50/50. This doesn't seem fair or accurate, considering we have quite a substantial height and weight difference. He's a big, very tall guy and I'm a slim-ish, slightly tall gal. Where does it go??????????..........

♥ Who does/did the laundry?
Our cleaning lady. When she comes. Which isn't very often lately. So then I do. But if I scream-cry when it starts raining on my washing drying on the line, Werner will run out and take it down very quickly, while I carry on cursing the clouds who are "out to get me".
Aw, true love.

♥ Who’s better with the computer?
Uhm, mr. Apple Gadget-freak... When we met I'd just bought my first PC and had dial-up internet installed, whoo-hoo! But I taught myself to blog in html code till Werner got tired of my swearing and pointed out the 'compose' button, which means you compose posts using wysiwyg. See, I'm smart too!

♥ Who drives when you are together?
Werner. (Refer: Question 25 above, I really, really hate driving so thankfully we live in the city where I can walk (almost) everywhere, yay!)

Tagging people seems to have gone out of fashion, so do this if you're stuck for something to write or if you too love sharing inappropriate amounts of information with strangers over the internet! And then let us know that you did. xx

back(b)log

2010-08-17T20:39:00.001+02:00

One day, an innocent, unassuming little bride-to-be discovered blogs.

Beautiful blogs and cool blogs and truthful blogs and lovely blogs and heartwrenching blogs.
She read, then followed and eventually devoured obsessively all the poetic language and dreamy images of the blogs and the little bride-to-be found it intriguing, stimulating, and inspirational.
She was so inspired that one good day, she felt compelled to put her own incredible adventure into words, and pretty soon the little bride-to-be had her very own blog!
The beautiful and the cool and the truthful and the lovely and the heartwrenching ladies, and a whole bunch of others besides, read the little bride-to-be's blog and left beautiful, supportive comments and sent other readers there with their beautiful, supportive words.

The little bride-to-be poured her heart out.
She told of the wondrous love she'd found, when she least expected it.
She recounted the remarkable journey she'd undertaken to test her love, which yielded more than she'd dared to hope for.
And she shared all the little details of the many happy plans that were made to celebrate her love.
The little bride-to-be loved her blog.
She couldn't wait to share another piece of her life and her love with the wonderful friends she found there.
Some friends were so very far away, that little gifts had to be shared in the place of coffee dates, and some were so very close by that coffee dates could be swopped for tequila nights and turn acquaintances into real life friends, as if by magic.

The big, happy day came, and the little blogger bride-to-be was a bride.
The little bride enjoyed a wonderful wedding day, and undertook a fantastical journey with her little groom.
They travelled and they returned and they searched for a brand new home of their own and found one!
They grew and they laughed and they learnt and they loved, oh did they love.
But the little blogger could blog no more.

Where before she found other blogs intriguing, stimulating and inspirational, she now found them competitive and intimidating.
Where before her mouth was filled with the words of her remarkable journey, she now felt dumb-struck in the face of measurement and comparison.
She tried to tell another story, of another time with another meaning but it wasn't quite the same.
Months went by and while the little blogger still read and followed and devoured the blogs of her friends, her voice remained lost in silence.

Somewhere amid the silence, the little blogger realised that she really, really missed writing her blog.
She still had much to say and share. Many opinions and ideas and questions and reflections.
But then she couldn't write because there was so much to say, to share, to exclaim, to ask and to reflect upon, and that kept her silent still.

One good day, and one good friend came along.
This was a very good friend, a friend who had been found through this wondrous world of blogs, and who had been cemented as a friend through shared tequila nights and many other fantastic adventures.
This friend encouraged, and perhaps even forced, the little blogger to just sit down and write.
The silence echoing from the little blogger's blank page compelled her to remember that in the beginning she wrote for no-one but herself.
That in the beginning, it was about keeping a journal of thoughts and feelings and plans and images and that it mattered not one bit how her thoughts and feelings and images were judged by others, because this blog, this very special first and personal one, was just for her.

Just like that, our brave little blogger was back.

image from vault49 via katrinleblond

threads

2010-08-13T15:50:00.004+02:00

I miss my sexyredframe, I really do.

But I've been busy, very very busy doing something else that I love almost just as much.

It involves dresses and shoes and make-up and hair and lights and cameras and action!

Please visit me here if you like:

www.threads-of-fashion.com

But one day I'll be back here more regularly, cause if a girl gets lazy with just one little blog, having three will certainly inspire her to get busy!

all things french & a fantastique Cape Town giveaway

2010-03-15T10:15:00.008+02:00

While my thoughts are spinning around all things French and fabulous, Cape Town super stylist & beautiful blogger Kim Gray launches a give-away for a weekend at Le Quartier Francaise!

It's like fate people, destiny!

So for my, like, two local followers, head over to Kim's blog right now to enter for your chance to spend a glorious weekend in the Franschhoek valley, sipping bubbly, exploring gastronomy and drinking in the most delightful scenery.

And if we don't win the giveaway, we can always treat ourselves to a little something wonderful from Kim's shop? I'm already addicted to Rosebud Strawberry Lip Balm, in love with my name necklace from Collect and slightly obsessed with owning a Flying Sprinbok in Mellow White with Salt & Pepper trim... Sigh...

For my fantastique foreign friends, go to Kim's blog anyway cause it's filled with all things bright and beautiful. Not to mention that Kim's own gorgeous wedding has even been featured on Stylemepretty!
Yep, she's that hot kiddos! Big up for the local talents!

A favour please, mes amies!

2010-02-15T20:18:00.003+02:00

I know it's a bit cheeky, seeing how horribly I've neglected you...

But dear reader, I got the most wonderful news and I need your help.

The beautiful boy and I will be traveling to Paris in the springtime!

There will be some work to be done, but before you know it, that will be over and then we'll have a glorious week to ourselves in the city of lights and beyond.

Lucky lucky lucky me.

So, these are my questions.

Have you been?

Where did you stay?

Where did you go?

What did you see?

What was your favourite restaurant / museum / park / shop?

Erm, which brings me to: shopping! Where do I go for trendy, quirky, AFFORDABLE fashion - is there such a thing to be found in Paree?

And then.

We'll have two weekends in the city so we are considering using the week in between to see somewhere else.

So I'm thinking ...

Champagne!

Reims, Troyes, Epernay ...

What do you know? What do you think? What would you do?

Exploding with excitement.

wedding bells

2009-10-28T12:42:00.006+02:00

Fashionista is getting married!

This gorgeous girl, so blessed with talent, skill and joie de vivre, met her match a mere five months ago. He swept her off her stylish feet with intelligence, passion and old-fashioned romance.
On Saturday, their friends and family will celebrate and rejoice and bless them with big, big love.
Yay love.

marvellous mail

2009-10-21T18:25:00.003+02:00

What's this?

A package in the mail?

Lovingly wrapped and tied with a bright red bow, handwritten card included...

And what do we find on the inside?

And I just did!

Update due as soon as I wear it out.
Thank you so much Stephanie, I truly truly heart Just Shoe Me.
No bribe required!
x

video killed the radio star

2009-09-16T13:43:00.002+02:00

love this so much

snapshot

2009-09-08T23:13:00.007+02:00

Two years ago I was missing my Beautiful Boy(friend), taking my girls to see P!nk in concert and preparing for a trip (to go see the boy) in the USA!

One year ago I was very busy planning my wedding to my Beautiful Fiancee.

Today I'm missing my Beautiful Husband, who's away on business in the USA...

Oh, sweet sorrow!

moved

2009-08-19T15:09:00.004+02:00

Things I love in our new home:

*A sunny courtyard for a family Sunday lunch on these gorgeous, bright, end of winter days
*A fireplace to warm and cheer me through these final, coldest nights
*A gas stove & electric oven to fuel the flames of the wannabe-cook in me
*A spare bedroom with an en-suite bathroom to make guests comfortable in their own privacy
*A study with a built-in little office space to gather my things and thoughts
*A short walk to the gym / the shopping centre / the independent book store / the sweet breakfast cafe / the fabulous bakery / the trendy sushi spot

Lucky me.

twilight

2009-06-17T08:03:00.000+02:00

I love it.
The teenage vampire chronicles?
The books, the movie, the ones still to come...
I shamelessly love it all.

Hot young things looking moody and abstaining till they're married.
What's not to love?

So I also have a slight girl crush on K.Stew.
She's so pretty.

With such great hair!

And apparently cool and not trying very hard to please anyone.

She values comfort over fashion!

And commits to the parts she plays with gusto.

Wow that's a make-under.
But to be fair it IS a great copy of Joan Jett's coiffure and general style.

So I guess it's all part of the method?

sunlit pics from vanity fair
others from those funny fuggirls

wedding envy

2009-06-16T21:05:00.004+02:00

This lady's wedding, dress, photography and not to mention kick-ass attitude, leaves me speechless.
Did you see their video?
Speechless.

Congratulations Dana & Hunter, on the most fabulously fun wedding I've ever seen!

cherish the dress

2009-05-20T13:30:00.007+02:00

So our fabulously artistic wedding photographer, Ian Mitchinson, came up with a crazy twist on the Trash the Dress concept.

We loved the idea so much, we had to participate!

Even though it involved cold, dark, water and near-drowning.

I simply couldn't sacrifice my Papillon on this altar of art, so we borrowed a dress from Robyn Roberts instead.

Then Hendrik Vermeulen took my breath away with his fairytale gown, reminiscent of my own wedding dress in some ways!

Sebastine Pepler did a great job, as usual, providing flawless, totally waterproof make-up.

Check out the site!

b&w

2009-05-04T12:11:00.004+02:00

DON'T GO THERE!

2009-04-30T10:04:00.006+02:00

Unless you have a make-over fetish and a LOT of free time!

Just for fun.

And this is just too much.

Okay Marli...

Step away from the computer...

That's it, slowly.

Evil internet!

super cool weather forecasts

2009-04-29T23:23:00.005+02:00

From here.

Thank you Cassandra for turning my frown upside down!

Stop being such a wuss!

2009-04-23T18:08:00.008+02:00

I am so in love with every one of these images.

The modern interpretations though? Not so much.

Maybe if I commit to a year or two of B&W pics only?

C'mon then, help me make up my mind.

Go for the chop, chop, huge *ffing chop or not?

Vote in the poll!

Thanking you, in advance.

busting out of the (fashion) closet

2009-03-24T12:39:00.003+02:00

I've been hiding it from you.
Not purposely, just quietly.
You graciously never asked, and I conveniently never told.
But my secret is eating me up from the inside.

What I do.
For a living.
Or rather, used to do.
Now try still to do, but not doing all that well.
This time of self-doubt, this time of examining, questioning, re-evaluating, has given birth to something bigger than me.

So here and now, in this time of silent desperation, I am compelled to reveal all.
It insists on busting out, breaking away from the comfy, dark covers of false modesty and hidden vanity, heedless of the shame and mockery that might follow.

There is a story wants to be told.

A story accompanied by numerous photographs of great humouristic value.

http://modelmental.blogspot.com/

Follow me, dear friends, from blogger bride to model blogger, if you wish.

x

sharing the love

2009-03-19T14:21:00.000+02:00

A long, long time ago, I got this from Elizabeth at Love and Marriage.

These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.

This from Cyd at The Sweetest Occasion.

1. Put the logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate at least 10 blogs which show great attitude and/or gratitude.

3. Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.

4. Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog.

5. Share the love and link to this post and to the person from whom you received the award.

This from Stephanie at Gossip.Style.Wed.

The Uber Amazing Blog Award is a blog award given to sites who:

- inspire you
- make you smile and laugh
- give you amazing information
- are a great read
- have an amazing design

The rules of this award are:

Put the logo on your blog or post
Nominate at least 5 blogs that for you are Uber Amazing!
Let them know that they have received this Uber Amazing award by commenting on their blog

Share the love and link to this post and to the person you received your award from.

And again, from Abbie at A Glimpse of the Girl Next Door

Thank you thank you thank you blogger friends!

And so, in my lazy crazy I'm not-really-here way, I'm awarding a "choose your own award out of the above" to the following blogs who were the first ones who inspired me, assisted me, made me think and wonder and feel not so all alone in the frothy world of bridal blogging:

A Desert Fete
A Girl and Her Blog
Baby Picture This
East Side Bride
Eight Years in the Making
From Diamonds to Vows
Girl Learning Along the Way
London Bride
Lovely Morning
Mother and Bride
Peacock Feathers and Diamond Rings
Peonies and Polaroids
Project Subrosa
P.S. I Love This
Ruby Slippers
The Broke-Ass Bride
The Day After
The Sweetest Occasion
Wemetinabar

And the non-bride bloggers I escaped to, in order to talk about other junk and hopefully retain sanity.

Being Brazen
Confessions of a Minister's Wife
Dancefloor Tragedy
Gossip.Style.Wed. (I wasn't sure where to put you dear Stephanie!)
The Cwtch

Love = shared.

20/20

2009-03-10T23:22:00.005+02:00

Tomorrow I'm going in for Lasik corrective eye surgery.
I'm squeamish at the best of times.
Here goes.
Gulp.

a lovely morning indeed

2009-03-05T13:38:00.003+02:00

The lovely Kristina from this lovely blog just made my day.

What a honey.
Metro Chic.
I'm so ahead of the curve now.

Thank you Kristina!

one last thing...

2009-02-27T13:08:00.005+02:00

this is a bit blind
but if you'd be so kind

just click on this link
(it's quicker than you think)

then pretty please, won't you vote for me?
so Werner and I can get stuff for free!

http://www.capeweddings.co.za/?option=com_comprofiler&task=userProfile&user=1487&month=11&Itemid=2

thank you!
xm

ps. below the main picture there is a tiny little off-white button with 'vote' written in green, just click on it! voting closes around 27 march 2009. xxx

auf wiedersehen

2009-02-24T13:32:00.003+02:00

My wedding is over, the recaps are done.
I loved my wedding, I love my man, I love my life.
But I am a tired little blogger bride.
I knew it would come, it happened to most of the wonderful blogger brides before me.
I need to let this go, for a little while.
I hope that when I want to write again, I'll still find you here, ready to share and listen and squeal and laugh and advise once more.
I'd like that.
Love x
Marli

our wedding N: dance

2009-02-23T00:10:00.010+02:00

The perfect words never crossed my mind
'Cause there was nothing in there but you
I felt every ounce of me, screaming out
But the sound was trapped deep in me

All I wanted just sped right past me
But I was rooted fast to the earth
I could be stuck here for a thousand years
Without your arms to drag me out

There you are, standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away, you leave me naked
Hold me close, 'cause I need you to guide me to safety

No, I don't wanna wait forever

In the confusion and the aftermath
You are my signal fire
The only resolution and the only joy
Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes

There you are, standing right in front of me
All this fear falls away, you leave me naked
Hold me close, cause I need you to guide me to safety

No, I don't wanna wait forever

(Abbreviated lyrics to 'Signal Fire' by Snow Patrol)

When we just started seeing each other, Werner made me a mix tape (on CD of course) that I kept in my car. I listened to that one compilation for months and months, while he was here and we were road tripping all over the place making memories to last a lifetime. And then when he was away and all was confusion and the longing would hurt so much. Some days I couldn't bear hearing it, on others it was my life line.

'Signal Fire' in particular spoke to us, the soft sweet sadness of our beginning and his leaving, and then the fervent urgency to be together right now, forever.
If you don't know the song, you should give it a listen. It starts off so pretty, melodic, sweet and serene. Hearing it now takes me back to this moment, in a flash.

Yes, we are singing along to each other, even though we knew it would look cheesy and dumb. We couldn't resist.

And then the chorus rocks out with loud, urgent drums and frenzied guitar.

Hello Papillon, I didn't realise you were such a naughty, sheer number?

We actually went for one dance lesson... Can you tell?

Oh dear, I really do love acting out to songs... I think this is "No I don't want to wait forever".

Now, every last little wedding formality was done and dusted. We'd done it!

It was time to party.

Before long, Werner had had enough of the tie, and he was breaking it down.

This boy is a VERY enthusiastic dancer. I think it's hot.

Some find it shocking.

Others try to compete.

I just like this shot.

We're getting the video this week.

I can't wait!

our wedding M: decor & dinner

2009-02-20T13:06:00.002+02:00

During the wedding planning, I mentioned in a post how each bride has her own personal wedding priorities. Flowers and decor were not high on my list. The hotel was pretty enough as it is, anything else was just a bonus. It's ironic that the florist ended up being one of our biggest expenses. I still don't quite know how that happened?

This was the mock-up of our table centre pieces, done at the florist's studio a month before the wedding. We'd given some vague indication of our likes and dislikes, included some key themes such as 'modern romantic' and this is what we got. We loved it.

On location, it looked like this. Very fresh, modern, not too fussy. Happiness.

At the eleventh hour I decided to splurge on menus to match our invitations. My favourite wedding quote, the one that kept me sane all through the planning process, is printed at the top of the menu.
"I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance, a church filled with flowers, friends and beautiful music. I asked him what kind of a wedding he wished for, he said one that would make me his wife."

We were sabotaged by quite a bit of wind on the evening of our wedding, so the hundreds of candles I insisted on, had very little effect at the outdoors dinner!

This is the upper terrace where our poor guests were left to the elements. Luckily some clever ones borrowed my MIL's beautiful quilts that were spread out at the amphitheater to keep warm.

The lower terrace was pretty much completely sheltered. The double doors at the end lead straight onto the dance floor.

Venues always look much better to me when they're peopled!

We only had one table inside, in a room opening onto the terraces from the left, for grandparents and other highly esteemed guests who wanted to be out of the weather. Here MIL and I popped round to meet and greet.

My maternal grandparents, who couldn't attend the wedding because they live far, far away and are a bit fragile for air travel these days, gave me these cut glass vases as part of my inheritance. I put my bouquet and the bridesmaids' in there, right on the dance floor, so Ouma & Oupa Liewie could be there in spirit.

These flamingos are actually part of my sister Ankia's inheritance from the Liewies, and I wanted to use them as my cake topper. Unfortunately the instructions got lost along the way and Werner ended up housing them in the bird cage that was meant for keeping cards from our guests!

I'd almost gone with easy-peasy supermarket cupcakes as wedding cake, but my MIL politely insisted that we get something a bit more special. These were Charly's mucking afazing chocolate cupcakes with white butter cream icing. The best cake ever! Says me, the "I don't really care for cake rather give me a packet of crisps" girl.

And then, the much debated cake topper that did make it to the top of the stand! Some brides have voiced concern at the negative connotations and stereotyping of such novelty figurines. My MIL and I saw it for the first time in RK Bridal in New York and loved it. Maybe it's because in our situation there was certainly no-one dragging anyone else to the chapel, that we could just enjoy the humour of it. Actually, if there'd been a groom dragging the bride, I would've chosen that one for sure!

our wedding L: amphitheatre

2009-02-19T15:50:00.000+02:00

While Werner and I were busy taking photographs, our guests waited in the amphitheatre at the bottom of the hotel's garden. They were served some delightful appetisers and as much sparkling wine as they could handle. We'd also set up a photo booth in the amphitheatre to amuse them while they waited.
We came back from taking pictures and, believing our guests to be well entertained, sneakily sat down in the reception area for a minute to catch our breath and have a bite to eat.
People kept coming past en route to the bathrooms and we'd tell them to pretend they hadn't seen us. It was such a nice, normal moment in between all the activity and excitement. While we were mostly just gobbling up basil-chicken-mayo crostini or washing down a strawberry-cream cheese bruschetta with some bubbly, we did share a very real, private moment of 'wow, we're married'!

I'd left the look of the photo booth entirely up to our capable florist / decorator. To be honest, when we spoke about a gold background, chaise lounge situation I was picturing a sumptuous Marie Antoinette style setup. What I got was a bit more Shaka Zulu, but that's fine too...

Here's a tip for future brides. A photo booth before plentiful alcohol is not nearly as much fun as one after plentiful alcohol. I thought my guests would be ~~wacky~~ interesting enough to create some crazy pics early on, but they were all disappointingly well-behaved!

Meanwhile Ian used the opportunity to snap some candid shots of our hyper photogenic guests.

Gorgeous Fashionista, aka Misi, the one who started it all. Mwah!

Then, finally, we were ready to arrive as Mr & Mrs. We came down the hill to the sound of "Can't take my eyes of you" by Frankie Valli and I was just happy, happy, happy. The party was about to start!

(sorry Ian, I've been messing with this picture...)

We'd been planning to sit in the front row of the amphitheatre seating, but when we got there I decided we'd take the chaise lounge instead. Front and centre!
Werner's siblings kicked off the proceedings with a short and very sweet toast to their parents. Fifteen year old Saskia stole the show with a heartfelt sentence delivered like a professional public speaker. The sentiment was "No one could ask for better parents than you, and I wouldn't."

Xander was pretty funny, but I'll have to see the video to remember what he said!
My brother Phil, order of events in hand at all times, was the MC.

Ankia toasted my parents. I need to hear that again too, but I remember her speech being very honest and true. No gross exaggerations or hyperbole. Just short, simple, stunning.

After the siblings, we had both the best men and two of my bridesmaids toasting Werner and I. Sadly the sun was setting and the wind was coming up, so we have no good pictures and it got quite chilly out there. I said a few words unprepared, I don't remember exactly what, except "I am loved and I am grateful". I cringe a little bit at having to watch it on video, but it felt right in the moment. After Werner's speech (of which I can recall nothing, how sad?) every last little formality was done and we could truly join the party as guests. Yay.

our wedding K: just the two of us

2009-02-18T15:07:00.001+02:00

I've said it a hundred times now, we love our wedding photographs! The portraits of just the two of us are no exception. Ian was super creative with the backgrounds available to us within one block of the hotel. It felt really quick and fun, locals were watching and cheering as far as we went and we did some slightly strange things...
I love the diversity of these pictures. We have everything from classically beautiful to interestingly artistic. And we remain very much Marli & Werner in every shot, nothing too posed or unnatural.

I love love love the muted colours of this one.

And also the vivid contrast in this! That shop really has two red chairs attached high up onto the wall, but I'll let you in on a secret: we weren't actually sitting on them.

I've always love wheat field landscapes, cheesy though it may be. Fortunately for me, Ian could make it look mean.

Or classic.

Or just plain pretty.

Right next to our 'wheat field' we had acres of really high vineyards.

This is the type of epic picture that made us fall in love with Ian's work.

Then there was some kissing to be done...

Ian had an idea for a paparazzi style shot, and told us to really 'go for it'.
Only too happy to oblige, Mr. Photographer.

And this is Werner actually putting the strap back up, not taking it off, promise.

I don't know what it is about this picture, and I could point out some things I don't appreciate about such an extreme close-up, but I'm totally in love with the image anyway.

Finally, the photograph where Ian said, this might feel weird and it might not work at all, but let's try it. I believe it's my favourite one of all.

our wedding J: family portraits

2009-02-17T09:41:00.000+02:00

When it came to styling the family portraits, we left everything over to Ian, as usual. We'd told him that we didn't want anything too stiff or formal, but then not too wacky or crazy either.
Once again Ian totally understood what we were after, and kept things quick and simple by taking us back to the walk street across the road from the hotel and lining us up against the wall!

I don't know whether it's purely Ian's magic or the fact that our families are just too damn cool, but these pics rock my world!

Werner's Ouma & Oupa: so cool!

The entire clan: Werner's siblings, parents and grandparents
[-1 Brother was writing exams in Japan so couldn't make it :-(]

My in-laws, how cute are they?

His parents, my parents and stepmom Celia. Love my Mom's expression.

All the siblings! Werner has 4 brothers (including the absent one) and a gorgeous little sister.
My handsome brother is second from the left and stunning sis is sitting on the chair.

The boys

And me...

Sisters yay!

And the best sisters pic. Doesn't she look just like us? Only more hair!

Then we scooted the family off, to hold fort at the party while we quickly got some fun pics with the maids and best men.

A Dynasty style shot of the bridal party:

Just hanging out in the street:

Okay fine, the boys can be in it too!

And here we said money... Or something else silly.

Thank you Ian!

spending hiatus: party particulars

2009-02-16T08:41:00.006+02:00

There was only one little blip on my spending hiatus radar this week.

Just after all the Christmas and New Years excitement died down, my friend and party planner extraordinaire, Margarita, approached me with an idea for a dinner she wanted to host. Though she always throws the most rocking parties in their smallish apartment, it would not do for a sit-down dinner so we planned to use her culinary skills, my dining room table and the opportunity to get together her friends and mine.

Once we sat down with the guest list though, trying to keep the numbers down to ten or even twelve was absolutely impossible. It seems that when you try and pick out a few folks from a whole circle of friends, it all unravels at the seams. So the idea evolved into a cocktail party rather than a dinner and when we looked for a date February 14th seemed ideal. Soon we realised that cooking up something to eat for twenty might be a bit of a challenge unless we kept it simple, like a stirfry. Thus a theme emerged and we thought, wouldn't it be fun to dress up? Werner, not knowing what he was getting himself into, had bought me Playstation Singstar for Christmas and 1,2,3 just like that, a Chinese (non) Valentines Dress-up & Karaoke party was born!

The Valentines date had its pros and cons. Most singles were only to happy to have a party to go to with a distinct lack of hearts and lovey dovey paraphenalia. A whole group of couples also found it a welcome release from the usual pressure, expectation and often disappointment of Love Day. I'd never had a great Valentines Day before, and while I don't publicly slander the 'holiday' I do find it a bit forced. On the other hand I feel: how can celebrating love ever be wrong? Conflict of interest there!

So on Saturday we spent quite a bit of money on the party. Werner and I dug out a kimono and a black velvet robe from my closet (I told you I have a lot of stuff in there!) so we didn't spend a cent on outfits. We told guests to bring their own drinks but I wanted to serve cocktails on arrival. Between the food and liquor, prawn crackers, fortune cookies, lanterns, flowers and other decorations, it all came to quite a shocking amount.

However, as I haven't been spending any money on clothes or accessories and since it was the first party we hosted since our house warming almost a year ago, I decided it was well worth it.

By the time the party was in full swing and everyone for clamouring for a go at the Singstar, it was priceless!

These pics are all from very early on in the evening. I'm afraid the China Blue cocktails I made were far too delicious to resist and impaired any photo taking abilities straight off the bat! I highly reccommend it!

Ice
1 Measure vodka
1 Measure lychee liquer
Top up with grapefruit juice
Add a dash of blue curacao

Yum.
Just the thing to get me through the second half of Simple Lovely's hiatus! Don't you think so agirl and october12? Welcome to the club! x

our wedding I: confetti

2009-02-12T06:52:00.003+02:00

I am in love with confetti shots, always have been.
To me it's the perfect illustration of celebration, joy and the blessing of the community on a couple's marriage.
Besides that it's also colourful, fun and someone's usually pulling a funny face!

Liezl & Iwan

Margarita & Kobus

Angela & Eben

Phrosne & Matthys

(by jean-pierre uys)

And then it was our turn.

Once again, we'd just taken over the street. Cars? What cars? Gotta love small town SA.

After the confetti, we took a little break. Just hanging out in the street, as you do. I was being my usual expressive self and dear MIL Ansie captured it.

Yay, we're married! And now there was only the small matter of a huge party to attend to...

our wedding H: ceremony

2009-02-11T06:48:00.005+02:00

*What I remember of the ceremony*

I saw Werner, he looked dashingly handsome.
He was wearing his tie and it made me laugh.
The first and only thing I said to him was: You're wearing a tie!

He had this incredulous look on his face, the one he often gives me when he asks disbelievingly: Are you really my girl? Which made me giddy with happiness.

He helped me onto the podium and held my hand ever so tightly, all through the ceremony.
I kept feeling his eyes on me, but I was trying to focus on the officiant, the message and the meaning, so I'd just smile and sneak a look back every now and then. My heart would flutter and I'd squeeze his hand back, causing our hands to be clenched together in a vice-like grip!

I love these pictures, taken during the prayer.

So funny to see who closes their eyes and who doesn't. That's my handsome brother in the black suit, looking very serious.

Our officiant made a few references to the hardships of marriage and the high failure rate, even though I'd asked him not to dwell on that. He jokingly referred to my request as well, so I had to smile and forgive him.

There was some noise and consternation in the street behind us at one point. We learned afterwards that a couple had passed by walking their two Great Danes and all our guests got distracted. We hardly noticed.

It seems the entire bridal party was paying close attention.

A little boy also sneaked up the steps and lay at our parents feet. When they asked him afterwards what he was doing, he said he just wanted to see the bride and be a part of the prayer. Bless!

It was all over before too long and time for us to say our personalised vows to each other.

Werner would say the line the first, then I'd repeat after him.

**In the presence of our family and friends, I promise to stay with you.
I want to share my entire life with you.
I promise all my love to you alone and that you will experience it every day.
You are my best friend, my heart's desire.
I am incredibly blessed and fortunate to call you mine.
I give you my heart. My soul. My being. All that I am.
I thank God for you.
I love you endlessly.**

It felt good to say those words.

Werner had the rings with him, I'd just passed my bouquet to Ankia.

I can't remember why, but we seemed to find the exchange quite hilarious.

And then we were pronounced man and wife.

And I kissed my husband.

And he kissed me.

And we kissed each other.

And it was good.

*Even though I tried so hard to really listen and pay full attention to the service and ceremony, it all left my brain as soon as we started kissing. For this reason, among many others, I am so looking forward to seeing the video!
**Our vows were actually written and spoken in Afrikaans. This is a quick, approximate translation!

our wedding G: here she comes

2009-02-09T18:54:00.000+02:00

I've mentioned a few times how blissfully calm I was on the wedding morning and how out of character it was for me. I still recall the slightly surreal feeling that seemed to envelop me. It was as if I was covered by a film of calm content, cushioning me against all angst, noise and fuss outside. I was fully present and aware of all the girls, the faffing, the flowers, the speeches and logistics that were discussed and completed and figured out, but I was floating through it all. BB called me once to ask where the menus were and I could tell that over at the venue things were quite frantic. It didn't phase me one bit. I guess I just truly realised that I couldn't do or control or change anything anymore, so I just let it be. And it was wonderful.

While floating around in my love bubble, I used the quiet moments in the make-up chair and breaks out on the balcony to think about the purpose of the day and the boy I was to wed.
I had zero reservations.
To a normally nervous, slightly cynical perfectionist, this in itself was and still is a miracle.
I was making the biggest choice of my life so far, and I had no fear, no worry, no care or concern.
I can only thank my Beautiful Boy for this, and God for making him the man that he is and seeing to it that we found each other. I can not find the words to express how exceptionally well we suit each other or how free and easy all of our interactions and communications are.

This man is the right man for me. The only one for me. I was so ready to find him, see him, promise him, love him, marry him.

We were early.
It was about ten to four when we were ready and waiting at the back end of the little walk street that was to be our aisle. So we sat in the car in front of a little general store for a while, Dad, the five girls and me. We were joking and giggling, people were staring and shouting out good wishes. I'm sorry I don't have any pictures of this moment but the girls had all left their bags with cameras and things behind already.

I was eager and keen to just go anyway, but Ankia reminded me that our family is notoriously late for everything, so I should just give the guests a chance to arrive and be seated. Finally, I think it was still about two minutes to four, I decided I'd had enough of waiting and we were off and out the car. Ian came running down the walk street to catch the moment.

I think I'm pulling a face here because the best men were supposed to be on the lookout for us to cue the music, but they weren't looking our way. I'm sure they weren't expecting us yet, as BB was so convinced that I would be late! I don't know where he ever got it into his head that I'm a tardy person but since we put all my watches and clocks forward by five minutes, he seems happier...

We started our long walk, trying to go slowly and sedately. I just wanted us to be walking normally, informally and I think I recall telling the girls to chat and laugh and pretend it's all normal. Mmm, sure bride, it's your day!

How cute is the street with it's prettily coloured details? They sell farm fresh and organic produce and some local and handmade clothing and home items in five different stores.

It took my Dad and I a while to figure out the hooking through of my arm in his with the flowers inbetween and holding my dress to prevent the train from dragging on the paved stones. But we got there in the end.

All the guests were seated on the front porch of the hotel, so here they could see us coming down the road. Riebeek Kasteel is such a small town that we hardly even checked the road before crossing! We just strolled over as if we owned it. After a massive search and much debate regarding the processional music, we'd chosen Micheal Buble & Nelly Furtado's version of Quando. What, I hear you scream? No really, go listen to it. It's gorgeous!

I love this shot with the big black BMW in the background, makes the maids look like a mean body guard posse! There's a story (literally) behind the car too. In the week before the wedding, I was working at an office where I go once a month. My boss there was very excited to hear that I was getting married in Riebeek Kasteel, as she has a weekend home nearby. I joked and said that we're getting married on the porch anyway, so she could come and have a look. And then she did! There's another picture of the street with her skulking behind the BMW, caught in the act. I think it's so cute that she came to see me!

I love my big hair in this next pic. Just the kind of swingy, heavy hair I never usually have!

And then we were there, at the foot of the steps. My stepmom Celia is in the corner, holding a seat for my Dad.

Mom's applauding in the corner behind Celia and Dad doesn't look too sad to be letting me go!

He even shakes BB's hand to thank him for taking me off his hands!

I love the look on BB's face. All earnest and grateful and full of promises to take good care of me. What a honey.

spending hiatus: update & thank yous & eye surgery

2009-02-09T13:47:00.004+02:00

The past week presented no serious challenges in my spending hiatus, for which I'm ever so grateful. I did get a little shopping-kick out of buying envelopes and other bits of stationery for our thank you cards. But surely that doesn't count, so I experienced a little guilt free pleasure, hurrah!

We printed four different postcards of our favourite wedding portraits and we're getting most of them out by hand delivery, but I'm worried about the rest getting ruined in the mail, hence the last-minute envelopes. And yes, the thank you cards are now quite overdue etiquette-wise, but some guests have theirs already so we're only about 60% late! We're all set to finish them tomorrow night so I can mail the last ones real soon.

On a completely different topic, I have a little poll I'd like to take. Have you or has anyone you know undergone Lasik corrective eye surgery?

BB is very sweetly encouraging me to have it done and today my eye specialist found that I'm actually an ideal candidate for a successful procedure. The only thing is, I'm terribly squeamish and a little bit scared of all things doctor / hospital / operation related. Maybe it has something to do with my Grandfather having died during a routine operation? My mom was only 10 at the time so I never even knew him or anything and I'm sure medical advances have been humongous since then, but I've just always stayed as far away as possible from any unnecessary medical attention. I'd rather leave well enough alone and carry on with my scratchy lenses and sexy red frames than risk a botched op.

So, if you have any knowledge or opinion on the matter, I'd love to hear from you!

our wedding F: portraits

2009-02-05T06:59:00.001+02:00

Somewhere in between all the madness, we took some "Bridal Portraits" too. That phrase is usually quite likely to make me break out in hives and run screaming for the hills, but in Ian's consummately capable hands, they came out quite cool.

Okay, "quite cool" was just me being modest. I think these fricking rock!

While all the commotion was going on at Cafe Felix, while we were playing dress-ups and posing and crying and laughing, there was another part to the story. Just out the gate, over the road and down the hill, a Beautiful Boy was waiting. Waiting for his love, all dressed up. He'd vehemently denied any and all wishes that he should wear a tie. The Beautiful Boy didn't like ties, didn't wear ties, and wasn't planning to start now.

Except, he did.

And he looked Beautiful.

Oh so very, very handsome and dashing and hot!

Sigh.

our wedding E: my family

2009-02-03T12:45:00.000+02:00

When we drew up our shot list for Ian, we kept it rather short and sweet and the groupings we really wanted were mostly to be photographed after the ceremony. I'd never even considered having some pics taken with my parents before the ceremony but suddenly Ian was there, we were all ready and there was a spare moment or two. My Mom was quickly bustled into the shot and we got these beautiful pics. What a bonus.

Ankia was obviously there too and looked absolutely stunning. I'm sorry we didn't get a pro pic of just me and her! But then that would've left only my brother out, which would've bothered me too. (Pedantic, me?)

I couldn't believe it was that time already when my Dad arrived. We're a big family of weepers and we were both worried that we were going to set each other off into sobs when we walked down the aisle. Meeting him beforehand was the best idea ever.

You can't see it in the pictures, but we had a quick little cry just when we saw each other, then we hugged and said that's enough now. I just love this series of images! The expression on Ankia's face is classic, grrr.

This picture makes me laugh because I have one so similar of when my Dad first saw me in my first formal gown, thirteen years before, with that same look on his face.

And my favourite of the lot.

I'd gone shopping with my brother and my Dad a month before the wedding. My Dad wouldn't believe us that he didn't have to wear a tie or jacket. I guess he's old school like that. He had his tie and jacket in the car, but it was such a warm day by now, I convinced him to stay cool and casual as he was.

My parents were divorced when I was fourteen, so having a picture with both of them in it is very rare. The last ones I had were taken exactly ten years before these, at my 21st birthday party.

When we recieved our photographs from Ian, all of these with my Mom and my Dad were the first ones I fell in love with. We look like us, not stiff or posed or unnatural and I feel so close to them when I think of how unconditionally they supported me all through life, but especially and surpringly when I made this hasty choice to marry my Beautiful Boy, whom they'd never even met. I guess they trusted in the way they'd raised me and in the person I'd become. I am so blessed.

guess what? i'm absolutely fabulous!

2009-02-02T14:36:00.003+02:00

I'm so excited I can hardly contain myself. I just found this little time-waster via this newly discovered and enjoyed blog. And they told me my style is:

ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS

There's no such thing as OTT in your book: why settle for average when you can have full-blown, va-va-voom GORGEOUS? In some homes, the result is a riot of carte blanche camp, but expressed more subtly, the glamorous look can be the dernier cri of sophisticated city living. It's all a question of how you combine colour and texture with attitude even if, secretly, you know that sometimes less is often more!

Now who wouldn't like to hear that? And in my dreams, it is all true. Yay for finding fun home stuff to do... It's the next level for me!

spending hiatus: i cheated!

2009-02-02T07:43:00.005+02:00

No, no, not in the way you think. I did get a new pair of shiny tiger print flats from Aldo and two pairs of pyjama pants from La Senza BUT I still had vouchers left from my birthday & hen night in November, yay! I didn't go one cent over the vouchers either, so I'm very impressed with myself. So what if I used up my last remaining shopping power all in the first month of the hiatus? Of course that doesn't mean that I find this quite hard? Hmm.

Cute, comfy & just a little bit wild. Half off on sale AND a gift card? Hiatus heaven.

On Saturday we attended Cape Town's annual show-off day at the (horse) races, the J&B Met. The Met's theme this year was Glitz & Glam so I truly deserve a pat on the back for not caving in and allowing some minor purchase to glitz up my glam. Not only did I borrow a (perfectly gorgeous, glamorous) dress from my honey of a sis-in-law but I even abstained from buying some incredibly bold and beautiful earrings, cuffs and/or statement necklaces from Diva.

I was in the shops with Minki just last week, looking for her new outfit, when we strolled into the little bargain accessories shop and I nearly succumbed. I don't know if it's just the lure of forbidden fruit but I've never seen them stock such fabulous things as they do at the moment. Maybe it's just that the trend for bold pieces is so appealing to me. Or a bit of both. Regardless, I walked out of shop empty-handed, severely conflicted. Over coffee we devised the clever plan that Minki could just buy it for me, as a gift. That would neatly circumvent the whole nasty hiatus business and I would have my oversized silver bling to wear!

Alas, as a bit of time passed and caffeine divine entered my system, the thrill of the prize started to wear off. Half an hour of pleasant conversation and laughs later, I remembered that I have some perfectly bold and beautiful silver things at home and I really, really didn't need anything new. That was it, crisis averted. Now I only wonder if I would've confessed to you, had we gone ahead with our criminal little plan?

My Beautiful Boy and I, en route to the Met.

our wedding D: ready

2009-01-30T09:01:00.001+02:00

With my favourite girls around, plenty of pampering going on, MTV in the background, delicious finger food for lunch and a little bubbly later on, the morning of my wedding felt more like a sparty than anything else. (Confession: I've never been to a sparty and never, ever thought I'd use the word, it just slipped out!)
I'd been up since 8am and Sebastine had started my hair at 10. I'd planned for everything to happen way ahead of time, as I tend to get a bit stressed under pressure. Before I knew it all the girls' hair and make-up was done and Ian had arrived. I'd also managed to do my mom's make-up somewhere during this pleasant passing of six happy hours! Ian quickly snapped the girls in their cute t-shirts while Sebastine finished my face.

And with heads...

As soon as I was all made-up, I was overrun by the paparazzi and striking cheeky poses. I felt fabulous.

Oh, the silly little blue ribbon around my neck? My mom gave it to me in the morning, kind of as a joke and I just tied it on. Liezl later gave me a garter with blue ribbon which I wore for my something blue, just so as not to tempt fate or challenge superstition.

This is my favourite, favourite, favourite getting ready picture!

Even though we were still very early, we decided to get dressed so Ian would have plenty of time for portraits. I remained the calm, zen, blissed person I'd been all morning. This was quite unlike me, and a very welcome surprise. I'm never hyper or overly anxious, but do tend to worry about little things. This day however, I gladly left it all in the hands of fate and the professionals I'd employed to run this show.
My dress just slips on, so I was decent within a second and nonchalantly started adding my accessories. This is the crazy beauty of wedding photographs and photographers: none of these shots are posed, I was just doing my thing. The girls were all in the bathroom getting their dresses on, hence the photogenic solitude.

I was just in my dress when there was a commotion at the door. Alwyn of extraodinary florists Okasie had arrived with our bouquets.

I must admit, I'm not really a flower gal. Our first meeting with Alwyn had entailed a detailed questionnaire which forced me to look up the names of flowers. So I told him what I liked and disliked, but after that left it all up to him. I think I'd given the key words modern, romantic, simple and stylish.
We'd also never chosen an official wedding colour scheme, as I like a different colour every week. When we printed our invites I rather randomly picked a chartreuse accent colour, as I was feeling it right then. My gorgeous, comfy shoes just happened to be green. Because I couldn't commit to a colour, we'd decided on white flowers for the tables. So in-between the green invite, the green shoe and since even all-white flowers have the green of stems and leaves in them, the wedding went green by default.

A few days before the wedding there was still a chance that the bridesmaids would each wear a different brightly coloured shoe and I considered giving them coloured posies to match. But then we went with black (and purple and green...) so I told Alwyn and once again, left it all up to him. I do love the bright green. And there's even hints of purple!

My bouquet was softer. Just lovely.

Finally, all were dressed, made-up and flowered. We took all these pictures at Old Oak Manor, where I'd slept. Very convenient.

My dear mom had been collecting confetti for months, but I told her I'd ordered all white petals from Alwyn. So we decided to use her's right there and then, and created my favourite pre-ceremony petal shower pic!

I was happy. Can you tell?

our wedding C: rings and things

2009-01-29T06:54:00.000+02:00

While we were busy being beautified, my photographer and his assistant arrived. They were early, which I found to be such a wonderful little gift for a bride! Without a moment's hesitation, they started capturing the details of the day.

Ian Mitchinson is the owner of Westside Studios and the only local photographer whose work left an undeniable impression on us during our search for a wedding snapper. We were always looking for something a little bit more interesting than your standard classic wedding portraiture. While great creative photography in this style seems rampant in the US (if wedding blogs are anything to go by), the matrimonial market in SA is still hesitantly exploring anything even slightly outside the expected. So we felt doubly blessed and confident when Ian's work held just the right amount of class and whimsy. Once we met with him, Ian's easy-going yet professional demeanour and clear understanding of what we were after made the decision a very easy one. We never met with any other photographers, the case was solved!

I'd decided early on that I wanted to go short and dark on my nails. I'm just not a french gal.
I was looking for a modern/vintage brown/red/grey colour but ran out of options and settled on Essie's Decadent Diva. I guess it's all in the name! The ring was a gift from my bridesmaids, we were all wearing matching ones on the day, but forgot to get a pic of it. Oh well.

I love this picture of my engagement ring that my Beautiful Boy had to work so hard for, lovingly named Lucy.

My wedding band is a very slim channel setting half eternity ring. Isn't it shocking how much smaller it is than BB's?

We lucked out with BB's ring. He never seemed to like anything overly much and I started wondering whether he'd ever choose something. When I finally found my band it was such an easy, obvious decision. I'd thought about different options and felt confused for a while, but when I slipped on the one, it was clear! The sales girl at that store then showed us a ring they were having made for another male client and that ring sparked the design for BB's one. You can see the detail nicely in this next picture. It's a comfort fit matt white gold band with a fine shiny white gold thread running over it in a wave pattern. We both love it for it's unique simplicity.

Every detail here has a little story. The bracelet (with the crosses) was an unexpectedly generous birthday gift from a friend. She gave it to me just two weeks before the wedding, not knowing anything about my dress or wedding style and I just knew it would suit and that I'd love to wear it. I also found it quite sentimental as she's actually one of BB's best friends, who have now also become mine. The earrings I bought for a REAL bargain and was never sure that I'd actually wear them.

Then I decided my personalised rhyme would simply be:
something old: I was wearing (fab) old shoes
something new: my (fab) new dress
something borrowed: the bow brooch was very kindly, and usefully, lent to me by the lady who altered my dress so that we could bustle it ourselves (after Jenny Packham Boutique told me it's impossible to bustle this dress, ha)
something cheap: my earrings!

I've had these shoes since 2005, and since they are beautiful and comfortable and I love them dearly, I decided they are worthy of carrying me through my wedding day.
Okay okay, I also couldn't find anything new that I really liked and trusted to be wearable and party proof. But I was very happy with my decision in the end. They stayed on and on and on...

My dress is Jenny Packham's Papillon. I am a very, very, very lucky girl. I felt comfortable, glamorous, sexy and natural. A dreamy dress for sure.

My bridesmaids all chose and bought their dresses themselves. I know them as super stylish cool & classy ladies so had no fears regarding their choices. I was only with my sister when she bought hers (the middle one) and nearly cried when she came out of the dressing room, all grown up and womanly. I love how they all looked together. I didn't prescribe shoes either. We were thinking all different colours, all silver or all black, but in the end I honestly didn't have a care, so we ended up with me in green, Sis in purple and the rest in black!

our wedding B: the make-up marvel

2009-01-28T06:55:00.000+02:00

I can not say enough my fabulous make-up artist.

There is a long, sad story of how another great make-up artist broke my heart but I ended up landing sensational Sebastine through the misfortune of others. You can read about it in the long, sad story.

The end result? Total visage bliss. Apart from turning me into the happiest bride in the world with a head full of ridiculously gorgeous hair, she also did all five my girls' faces, and so brilliantly. You can hardly see they're wearing anything, until you check the before pics!

Sebastine was calm and sweet and helpful and charming and excellent overall.

darling vicki, all the way from england, which she calls home... for now

mischievous minki, my soulful party playmate

marvellous margarita moon, oldest companion and sharer of all life's vagaries

my only sister ankia, obviously feeling a little funky... love this girl

lovely liezl, willingly exiled all the way over in Colorado and much missed!

Everyone looked so divine! Sebastine also gave each of us a little touch-up kit including a lip brush, our lip colour, some gloss and a dab of our foundation on a sponge. Mine also had some mints and a tissue. So considerate, too sweet for words, professional perfection.

Sebastine also happens to be a total hottie, a great wedding guest and a very good friend.
I've said it before, I'll say it again:

I heart Sebastine Pepler.

our wedding A: getting ready

2009-01-27T14:56:00.013+02:00

On the morning of 22 November 2008, I woke up in the gorgeous white loft room at Old Oak Manor in Riebeek Kasteel.
And I was grumpy.
I'd slept well enough, considering all the thoughts running through my head on such an excited night, but I just felt groggy.
Great, I thought.
Here we go.
Big day, fantastic purpose, huge party and I'm feeling a bit crap?
I got up out of my little single bed, opened the French doors, and suddenly smiled.

Before me lay the exact view that had made me fall in love with this sleepy little town years before. Mountain, vineyards, trees, pond, lavender, and this was the clincher: all shrouded in a light cool mist.
When I first saw the Kasteelberg like this in 2007, it was the middle of winter and the mistiness was to be expected.
22 November though?
Height of summer in the Cape?
This was odd.
Oddly comforting, uplifting and fabulous. Like a little sign (or a big one really) reminding me that this day was different.
This day was unique.
This was my wedding day.

My mom had stayed with me the night before, so the two of us headed to Cafe Felix downstairs for a lovely last mother-daughter breakfast. I was as calm as can be, excited and content. I knew that in an hour or two, our restful haven upstairs would become a hive of buzzing activity as my mom, my five bridesmaids and I had to be readied for our show-off event of the year. This was going to be fun!

My mom was such a darling on the day, giving us all foot massages, taking bored maids downstairs for coffee to give the busy ones some room to move and making sure we all ate a little lunch. She was also entertaining...

That's enough now... Step away from the dress!

After we set my hair in pins, I had hours to just muck about and hang around while my five girls were getting their make-up done. To feel useful I repacked my overnight case and considered what to take if the weather should remain so cool.

My brother & MC swung by to check on his duties. It was quite apparent that he'd had a late one with my cousins the night before! But I totally trusted it all to him, he's reliable to a fault. This is him (or some homeboy version of him) and my sister & maid of honour.

I could hardly believe it when all the girls were finally done and it was time to finish my hair and start on make-up!

I'd decided that this was as good a time as any to switch from juice to bubbly. Delish.

spending hiatus: 100 monkeys

2009-01-23T07:03:00.002+02:00

Bear with me here, complicated story, very simple ending.
A great friend recently told me about the Hundredth Monkey Effect and it had such a profound influence on me that I now keep noticing such effects. (Oops, wikipedia has just debunked the whole shebang so I don't know where that leaves my monkeys, but regardless, I have a point!)

The whole world and more directly my fellow bloggers have been focussing my attention on all things green and ecologically sound. I've been recycling for about a year now, I walk when I can and try to shop eco-aware. While I'm surely not offsetting my carbon footprint yet (or even my carbon toe-print for that matter) I am trying to do my little bit to help out this pretty blue planet of ours.

So during and after the wedding planning, all these thoughts and ideas on reduce, reuse and recycle have been floating through my mind. During this time I also experienced a ridiculous slew of gifting, thanks to my hen night, my birthday, our wedding and Christmas all happening within a 6 week period. By the time it was all over I felt sick of stuff, more over-fed on pretty things I don't really need than on Christmas pudding. I'd even tried to ask my family if we could give each other heart-felt letters in stead of gifts for Christmas but they'd already done their shopping. Damn organised early-birds.

Enter UK Vogue, December 2008 issue. Inside this fantastically beautiful tome to over-spending and wasteful consumerism I found a little article about a woman, who works in fashion, and stopped buying clothing for one whole year. I was fascinated. I immediately raised the issue in conversation and my FIL started laughing at me. He said "No my dear, you shouldn't even consider it. You'll make yourself miserable, and for what?" Then he told my MIL what insanity I was contemplating and she seriously admonished me "Don't do this to yourself, it's not necessary!" When BB joined in on the conversation he also found it laughable, and I believe he still does.

The more everyone found it crazy and laughable, the more they seemed to insinuate that I'm a shopaholic who'd be a wretched wreck without a weekly spend, the more determined I became. So without making an official proclamation or promising anything to anyone, I silently vowed to give this a shot. My extenuating circumstance for such apparent masochism is that I honestly have an extensive wardrobe. I mean, it's stuffed. With beautiful things I maybe wear once a month, every two months. This all came about when I worked in a gorgeous boutique for two years where part of my compensation was a very generous clothing allowance. So apart from my normal thrifty bargain hunting trophys, I also have two year's worth of really good items crammed in there.

To get back to the monkeys, as soon as I came back into blogland, what do I find? A spending hiatus revolution, complete with support group! I've also spotted this on many other great blogs, but this was the first one I found.

Thus. I am joining the spending hiatus, and these are my rules.
I will not buy any clothing or accessories. I'm starting on the three months with the group, but secretly I am aiming for a whole year. There, I said it.

I actually started at beginning of January already, so I'm three weeks in and so far so good. I'm too high on my accomplishment to even miss it.

The only thing I almost bought, that very nearly tempted me, before I'd even formalised the resolution, was a check shirt in the prettiest shades of grey & lavender that I KNOW I would've worn to death with rolled up sleeves in the summer and then layered in the winter. It was only R100 (10 dollars) and I still think of it (obviously!) but that is the price I'm willing to pay...

Whether this plan will save the planet, reduce me to a pleasure-starved, unpleasant person or just put a few extra pounds in my pocket, remains to be seen!

the hen night: the end

2009-01-22T13:14:00.000+02:00

In my hurry to recap the wedding and be done with it, this little draft fell by the wayside. But it's too good to skip, so I present to you: what Werner was up to while I was dancing, singing, eating, drinking, changing, opening presents, posing and generally acting like a silly hen a block or two away.

At his bachelor's party, each guest was asked to bring a tie they could bear to part with and an amusing or preferably even embarrassing anecdote of life with Werner. As they told their stories and crowned him with ties, they allocated penalty drinks according to how naughty, rude, ridiculous or just plain terrible his behaviour was during the particular incident. Now I love him to pieces and won't have a bad word said against him, but the boy has been up to some pretty dubious activities in his checkered past!

The background on the reoccurant tie-theme is this. Even in his very official office job Werner bluntly refuses to wear a tie. He didn't wear one to his graduation and wasn't planning on wearing one to his wedding. So best man Eben decided to let him have all the ties he couldn't handle for one night. They elegantly combined the tie theme (Tie-ing the knot) with a jailbird look, as is beautifully portrayed in the saying printed on his t-shirt: "Marriage is not a word, it's a sentence: Life without parole." And then best man David brought him a kiddies Superman cloak, just because.

My boy works the look, blue steel style.

My darling sister had also been kind enough, unbeknownst to me, to pass on one of my most beautiful modelling pictures to decorate the back of his shirt.

Thanks, sis.

By 1am or so, we were finally reunited. We were both a little worse for wear, VERY happy to find each other and the co-ed party carried on till four in the morning.

My "I-am-officially-tipsy" pose. A certified units-consumed measuring device.

My girls (minus Vicki, who had to leave for another wedding the next day) and I, one last photo.

And the boys, Eben on the left and Dave on the right. Crazy kids.

I think this pic is the start of "maybe we should start heading home?"

And this one sealed the deal.

Thanks bridal party, we had a rocking good time!

hen night: phase 3

2009-01-22T07:51:00.006+02:00

I can't explain these pictures...
I'll let them speak for themselves...

hen night: phase 2

2009-01-21T06:46:00.003+02:00

We went to one of my favourite places, Rick's Cafe and I was stoked to find another whole gaggle of girls waiting for us there.

Ilna & Ankia

Angela & Tertia

Claudine & Coco & Me

Ankia & Ansie (my wonderful MIL!)

Vicki & Me

Minki, Margarita & Me

Liezl & Margarita

Sure, they look innocent.

But they're not! Cause then came the part where I had to do ridiculous things I would never normally do.

Like drinking champagne through a penis-straw.

I also had to answer questions about BB and our relationship. If I got it right, I could open a gift. If I got it wrong, I had to perform a task pulled from a hat. Like...

...doing the macarena...

...the can-can...

...and snorting like a pig...

...at least I got loads of luscious lingerie to make up for it!

There was some drinking when I got questions wrong...

At least not only by me...

We laughed, a lot!

And then, just when I thought it was all over and time to relax, a wardrobe change!

hen night: phase 1

2009-01-20T10:08:00.018+02:00

I ain't no spring chicken, and even back when I was one, I'd never been the biggest party animal. BB and I both love to socialise and a beer or a g&t is usually welcome, but going big and staying out till sunrise has never been our thing. Most of our closest friends however, reign over the party animal kingdom on a throne made of crazy parties, late night dancing, and unexpected sunlight calling the end to raucous evenings. So I was wondering how the whole hen night / bachelors would work out.

We were a little bit prescriptive about the when and how, as we really wanted as many of our bridal party and other overseas guests as possible to be there, which boiled down to one date only. So we always knew when it was going to happen, one week before the wedding on the Friday night. We also asked very nicely if we could possibly do our separate boy/girl things and then meet up later in the night. Our gracious best men and maid of honour made it so, yay.

It all started out rather innocently. With pizza and champagne and some fab gifts. It was just me, my sister/MOH, my four bridesmaids and honorary guest Angela, who is married to one of BB's best men and has become a really great friend of mine. I was excited and so enjoyed having my best friends in one place all at the same time, I don't think I've ever had that! I was also secretly relieved to still be wearing my own clothing, with just a tiara or two to single us out. I really didn't want to be dressed like an idiot or forced to do stupid things I would never normally do.

Nightingale (real name Minki) me & Angela

Bombshell (Liezl) Vicki & Jewel (Margarita)

And then I got the cutest gifts...

'Just Married' flip-flops that leave a message in the sand

Iron-on bling for our day-of t-shirts

These rings are my favourite. Liezl bought four black ones for each of the maids and an ivory one each for me and my sister to wear on the wedding day. I love love love them!

I was feeling all loved, bubbly, happy and calm. It looked like the girls had taken my comfort-loving nature into account and we were really just going to have a pleasant night out, just us. It suited me perfectly.
But then they started acting weird, signalling each other and wolfing down their food, as if we had to be somewhere else. The next moment I was dragged into the bathroom and changed. Into a cleaning lady's outfit.
Sis Ankia & I

No, not sexy french maid or anything flattering like that...

Just your regular cleaner's uniform! Thanks girls, I owe you...
And then we changed venues!

framed

2009-01-16T14:54:00.003+02:00

Last night we attended a little blogger bash here in our Neighbourhood. It was my first ever social with fellow bloggers. I won't lie to you, it was weird. And I was nervous. And shy. It's so strange to meet someone for the first time yet know more about their thoughts and feelings than you ever would without this wonderful sharing-is-caring tool.

Over the past few months I've become exceptionally well acquainted with a wonderful girl going through a terrible break-up. She found some comfort and promise in my Beautiful Boy story and we started e-mailing a while back. It all culminated in meeting each other at the top of the stairs at 8.30pm last night! DT blew me away with her gorgeous, bubbly vibe and from there things went swimmingly. She introduced me to the lovely, sincere Roxilla, the vivacious Dolce, gregarious Kyknoord and smoothie Blade. There were other bloggers and friends there too but I just didn't manage to chat to everyone, being nervous and shy and all.

DT and Rox also had a purpose to the meeting, and some selfless reaching out and honestly making a difference is on the cards. Which is really amazingly karmic, as I've been feeling a seriously philanthropic urge to spend my blessed free hours on this earth to better avail...

But the point of this post is the frames. The red frames. The sexy red frames. Or rather the lack thereof. I mean, the blog is named after them! Yet they do not appear on any of my wedding photos, they aren't visible on my profile pic and I wasn't wearing them at the bash last night either. The thing is, I am not supposed to wear contact lenses, but I do, when vanity/insecurity/necessity prevails. And just to prove that the frames are real, not some imaginary spectacle or a false facade, some pictures for you. I love my little red ones, I really do!

something strange is going on

2009-01-15T09:31:00.007+02:00

I was in the kitchen last night. After dinner. And I was... making gazpacho?! Now while I love all things tomato and the smell of the fresh, juicy, ripe reds wafting through the apartment was a pay-off in itself, I am not the kind of girl who spends her evenings preparing delicious cold Spanish soups! In fact, I'm not even the kind of girl who owns a blender with which to prepare said delicacy. Until of course, the wedding registry. So now I own a blender (thanks Sis!) and now I'm apparently in the kitchen, at night, blending.

But that's not all. A few nights ago I impulsively whipped up some grilled lamb chops with roast vegetables and a green avo salad. This was in the same week that my darling husband got treated to roast chicken and veg on couscous. Made. By. Me.

I don't understand it. I honestly didn't go on any cooking course, I don't have a new cook book, I have never cooked these dishes before and I didn't know that I even knew how...

The only possible explanation therefore, is that when one gets married, a wealth of household information and instruction is automatically imbedded in the bride. A kind of culinary collective consciousness opens up to her as she is welcomed into the fold.

Either that, or my Beautiful Boy is just such an incredibly kind and generous, loving, understanding and supportive Beautiful Husband, he inspires me to greatness. Yeah, I think that's it.

you never think it will happen to you

2009-01-13T12:25:00.004+02:00

"Part of me doesn't want to share my wedding with the world. I think I'm afraid if I shake it too hard the glitter will fall off."

East Side Bride uttered these concisely descriptive words in her post on Meg's Wedding Graduate series. I read it in October, about a month before my wedding and I thought: 'what a beautiful sentence. what a load of crap.' (Sorry eastside but I did, at the time...)

And now, guess what? I'm protectively hugging the day to my chest, fearful to put into words all the wonderful little things that I experienced and anxious to relive some less wonderful realisations that I had.
I am a perfectionist so I was always going to notice tiny imperfect details. In the spirit of honest and true reportage I'd feel compelled to admit that there were things that I would've liked different (and I'm not talking about the shade of the napkins or the position of the centre pieces!) but do I really want to dwell on that? I very neatly set those issues aside the second I became aware of them on the day and now I fear that if I revisit the day from moment to moment I'll be awash in the memory of everything as it really was, in harsh retrospective light and not be able to carry on living happily in the hazy dreamy blissful ideal that I recall when I think back generally.

Wow, that makes my wedding sound like a disaster.

Let me rephrase. My wedding day was gorgeous, joyful and intensely meaningful. I was as calm and ready and excited as is humanly possible. Our friends and family members surrounded us with love and good wishes and then we were man and wife and we felt like the luckiest, happiest people on earth. All the planning came to fruition to ensure an intimate ceremony, a festive dinner and a kick-ass party. I couldn't have asked for more.

But it's hard to write about it.

Kudos to all you brave blogger brides who jump right in and share, because that is ultimately why we're here in the blogosphere isn't it? To share. Our experiences and thoughts and ideas and emotions.

Writing this post is the start. I'm sure I can work through my issues and show you my beautiful day, when my beautiful boy became my beautiful husband.
Soon, soon, soon.

too late to apologise?

2008-12-18T08:18:00.003+02:00

Dear blog.

I am sorry that I haven't called or written in so long. I know the few pictures I sent you hardly count as a contribution.

Please understand that I am a newly-wed in love with my man and my newly-married life.

In the lead-up to the big day and the ensuing endless honeymoon-of-perfection there were so many little normal things left undone and some human friendships slightly neglected. Then there is the mountain of presents that generous guests need to be thanked for and since the registry did not perform its function in the least and unruly cards are wont to fall off presents, we first have to figure out who gave what and return the many multiples!

And now it is the holidays and Christmas is rapidly approaching and we're headed off up and down the coast to see all the lovely family members who made our wedding day such a fantastically wonderful experience.

So I hope you understand, and realise that I love you still and always will.

I will be back in the New Year, and I'll bore you to tears with all my wedding adventures. I'll upload so many photos that you'll want to block me and you'll beg me to move on from the wedding, eventually.

And then I will.

And then we'll be great friends once again.

So you have yourself a merry, blessed Festive Season and a banging New Year.

Love always,
Marli

details

2008-12-14T19:09:00.005+02:00

wed!

2008-11-24T09:38:00.002+02:00

1. He wore a tie, just for me, and looked smoking hot!
2. I was super relaxed, ecstatic, excited all day long
3. The ceremony felt so intimate, loving and real
4. The photo session was a blast
5. Things went a bit wonky over dinner but our lovely guests made it go away
6. The reception was a massive, crazy, marathon dance party, which I never expected, and loved, loved, loved!
7. Overall it was just imperfectly perfect and I couldn't be more thrilled.

We leave for Bali in about 12 hours, I can hardly wait.

ooh lordy

2008-11-21T12:01:00.000+02:00

I've been completely calm, so calm I fell asleep during my mani/pedi this morning!
Now that I'm sitting here writing the final post before the day, I can hardly type... Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!
See you on the other side.
Eek.

the wedding: super quick update!

2008-11-18T23:51:00.005+02:00

Hello blogosphere, how I miss you!
Sorry it's been so long?
BB is snoring cutely upstairs and I finally have half an hour to myself so here I am, forgive my absence!

The past week has just flown by in a blur of happy activity.

I had my hen night, the best night out of my life, it was fantastic. Embarrassing pictures later!

And then so many of our friends who live far away have arrived in town and now it's daily breakfasts and shopping and lunches and wine tours and sun-downers and dinners and on and on and on...

BB and I really miss our copious amounts of alone-time together, but also realise that there will be years and years for that, so we're living it up and absolutely adoring having so many fabulous people gathered for this celebration of ours.

Monday night I finally had all my bridesmaids together in their entirely individual black dresses and they looked so uber-stylish and drop dead gorgeous, every one of them, it was too exciting!

Arrangements have moved along steadily enough, hiccups and surprises galore but I've just been in the most zen-like state of calm, peace and pure joy, nothing gets me under.
I thank the wedding gods for this state of grace, I swear I'm not even on the Calmettes (yet!). I actually think it's from reading on so many blogs how important it is to maintain focus on the true priorities of the day and not sweat the small useless stuff you can't control anyway? Either way, it's working like a charm and I am an ecstatic bride-to-be!

Things that went wrong:
Darling photographer cancelled our venue recce, was not impressed but it will be fine, he'll come early and do it on the day.
Dear friend of BB's brought an extra guest to stay, unannounced... Long story but we're coping well.
Dear family member of BB's has to go in for a hip operation today and won't make it to the wedding. (Best of luck and strength to her!)
2 Good friends' parents home was flooded in storms last week and they missed the hen night :-(
Storms last week! Crazy, heavy rain and insane winds... If my wedding was last weekend I just can't imagine how it would've been!

Things that are going right:
Weather forecast for Saturday looks just perfectly balmy, slight breeze, bit of cloud... exactly what I ordered!
My dress fits like a comfortable glove. An unbelievably beautiful, glamorous, ethereal, feminine glove.
My bridesmaids look amazing and have been getting on great.
Our lovely guests are making it such a fun week for us.

I can not wait to marry my man.
My man, my man, my man.
What a good man.
I love him!
To pieces.
Yay.

And here's just a sneak peek of some little sentimental pretties that might feature on Saturday!

I can't wait.

I CAN'T WAIT!

jewel

2008-11-18T08:42:00.011+02:00

My childhood friend, Jewel, who became my high school friend, my varsity friend and then my friend for life, got married on 07/07/07 in a beautifully indescribable shade of pink.

It was the middle of the winter, she wore red feathers in her hair, her daisy-covered vintage Beetle served as the wedding car and the groom was in jeans. The strap of her dress snapped just after the ceremony, the itunes acted up for a little while, someone spilled a beer all over her somewhere during the crazy snake dance and we all got soaked to the bone while trying to find our overnight accommodation...

Regardless, it was the most fun wedding I've ever been to. A perfect celebration of love, joy and friendship. Just awesome.

Love you Jewel! x

blonde bombshell

2008-11-13T09:00:00.000+02:00

I have five bridesmaids. Four have (newly shortish!) dark hair and the fifth, well, I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

Bombshell came home from London to get married to her fabulous man in January 2007. I don't know how the poor dear planned such a glamorous, sumptuous party from afar, when all we did was have our bridesmaids dresses made! But it was a classy affair from start to finish, at a stunning hotel in Cape Town's famous Waterfront.

The day was filled with champagne (the real deal no less, it was that kind of party!) and giggles and ended in a truly gorgeous meal and hours of dancing. It's so hard to pick out my favourite pictures, sadly the inept photographer made the choices more obvious. I refuse to make a rant out of this post, so I'll leave it there.

The Choos darling, the Choos!

My favourite memory of the day is how Bombshell never, ever stopped smiling her infectious little-girl-in-a-candy-store smile. So, so beautiful.

Oh happy, happy day.

yesterday, today, tomorrow

2008-11-12T06:31:00.002+02:00

Yesterday I wanted to cave under the pressure. I felt out of control, overwhelmed, unprepared and just swamped. I knew this was irrational and untrue, but I have a hard time managing my stress levels with cognitive reasoning. I'm working on it okay?

So I got a couple of things done, not the least of which was tasting and booking the fabulous cupcakes of Cape Town institution Charly's Bakery for our wedding cake. Their slogan is mucking afazing cakes. Nuff said.

Today I feel calm enough to think back nostalgically and reminisce over wonderful weddings gone by.

My dear friend Venus* from student days got married in April 2005 in her home town, a tiny little place in a vast semi-desert. The girl reflects the place she's from: warm, dramatic and uniquely beautiful with a heart as big as the wide African skies.

Venus and I had lost touch since studying together, living in different countries before everyone had Internet access at home. Finally we were both back home, she got engaged to her beautiful boyfriend of ten odd years and Nightingale (one of my best friends) was to be a bridesmaid. Venus was the first of my friends to get married in the big way; white dress, lots of bridesmaids, big reception. In the months leading up to her wedding, I was so excited to join in and help out in the search and planning efforts, she ended up asking me to be a bridesmaid too. I could also assist by doing her make-up for her, as there aren't too many professional make-up artists out in the Karoo desert!

The make-up and veil trial. I was so nervous to be responsible for her wedding pictures, luckily she's a natural beauty... I never let anyone else talk me into that again!

I can assure you that zero Internet research or blogging inspiration was involved in her wedding, but thinking back to the details today, that girl had some great style and intuition. She bought a dress off the rail at a weddingy chain store and we altered it a little bit with hand made rose corsages and a feathery beaded brooch. She also designed and made her own birdcage veil, years before I would know that's the name for it! We sat down together for a couple of days to make a rose brooch for every female guest and wrote and decorated table numbers, lists and menus ourselves. Each bridesmaid picked her own dress in a similar dusty pink colour and we accessorised it with a vintage feel.

All the guests stayed over on her parents' farm or guest farms in the area for the whole weekend and it was a wonderfully intimate, sincere, no-fuss wedding. The entire ceremony and reception was planned for outside, under enormous trees in the desert sunshine. Everything went great throughout the ceremony (if you discount the fact that her veil blew off the second we got to the altar!) and off we went for pictures. The next minute a thunder storm drenched guests, tables, starters and bridal party to the bone. A nightmare in any bride-to-be's books, but somehow I don't remember Venus freaking out, not even just a little bit. I remember that it made for my favourite picture as we all ran into a little shed nearby, I remember us girls treating Venus to a luxurious bath and foot treatments the night before and I do remember dancing for hours after our little stint in the rain.

Years before the sexyredframe, there was the not-so-sexy black frame!

I absolutely love and adore this next picture. If you look closely you can see her darling father in tears at the big moment. Tears of happiness, I assure you as Venus, her boy and their angel son are a wonderful example of a beautiful family in love!

My favourite photographs follow. You can see how wet my arm is!

Killer legs, awesome photography.

All of which just reaffirms my current mission.

Tomorrow, I solemnly vow to stop feeling anxious, nervous or distressed about ANY of the silly party fluff surrounding our wedding next Saturday. I will truly stop and smell the rosy fragrance of this beautiful time in our lives and relish the thought of bringing all our favourite people together for one special day.

princess

2008-11-10T11:13:00.003+02:00

Right, I'm going to be a good girl and not spend so much time on here.
That should mean more time actually finishing up the wedding details?
Here's hoping!
So for today the spoilt princess that I am turning into thanks to my amazing fam & friends, will leave you with a collage of all the lovely little pressies she got for her Bday!

Lucky lucky lucky me.
Thank you lovelies!

random things: a meme from being brazen & DT

2008-11-08T11:31:00.004+02:00

Word for the week in my head is Party!
Wednesday lunch reunion party, Wednesday dinner family party, Friday night Birthday party, the bridal party, cupcakes and music and sparkling wine for the biggest party of my life.

Thought for the week in my head is remember the wedding reception is just a big Party.

Thing for the week in my life is bubbly and lots of it!

Song for the week in my head is RELAX: Frankie goes to Hollywood.

Food for the week in my belly is the usual mix of sushi, Indian, pizza plus incredible cuisine from Ginja… around the world in a meal or two.

Colour for the week in my life is multicoloured prints. Especially the burnt orange / mustard / lime green swirls of my second favourite dress in the entire world, a birthday gift from my Future Parents in Law. (DANKIE!)

Smile for the week on my face is due to excitement at impending parties and Bombshell arriving home from Denver!

Blessing for the week in my heart is the tangible love and good wishes from my wonderful family and friends.

Here are the rules:
1. Link back to the meme creator (cathjenkin)
2. Link back to person who tagged you (brazen) and (DT)
3. Share your random thoughts list.
4. Tag as many people as you like.

I'm making this a free tag... Do it if you want to!
(See, bad at delegating.)

the wedding: honeymoon

2008-11-07T07:50:00.007+02:00

Here's a tip, free and for nothing. My favourite part of the wedding planning so far was researching, dreaming of and deciding on the honeymoon! It's my happy thought when I get down and the big pay off at the end of the year's work.

Of course I'm looking forward to the actual day and to marrying my wonderful man and I absolutely expect to have a brilliant wedding filled with meaning and love and all the things a wedding should be, but come on. Don't tell me two weeks in Bali is not something entirely different to look forward to? Yep, two weeks in Bali baby.

BB and I went through a whole virtual trip around the world together to get to Bali, and it was fantastic. I know a lot of grooms organise it all on their own and it's meant to remain their secret, but this was just too much fun for me not to participate.
Confession, when BB started muttering phrases including "hiking trips through the Amazon" and "climbing expeditions in Machu Picchu", I also felt compelled to intervene! I'd love to do something really adventurous, challenging and character forming like that one day, but not straight after the busiest year of my life, please?

In order to find a happy medium, we then investigated medium-adventure destinations like Costa Rica, Belize, Guatamala, Madagascar and such, but nothing seemed a perfect fit. We were also super keen to see Brazil but the travel agents we approached didn't seem very interested in helping us find anything out of the ordinary. No, they just kept pushing the same big resort, all-inclusive package deals to Mauritius, Seychelles and Thailand onto us... Fabulous vacations, I’m sure, but not what we were looking for.

So what were we looking for? We can be quite the picky couple let me tell you. I wanted: warm sun, mild sea, sandy beach, nice pool, a little luxury, some privacy, good food, shopping and the option to explore some night life. BB wanted mild weather, good swimming, tropical scenery, exotic culture, exploration, fab food and no anonymously huge hotels.

I spent days on tripadvisor and eventually we found the concept of Private Villas in Bali. You can get your own little one bedroom villa, with your own little pool in your own little backyard for the same price or less than the big resorts charge for just another room like any other. (You have to contact the villas though and check their package rates. Their advertised rates are much higher than what we paid!) My own pool? I don’t care if it’s the size of my living room rug, I like quaint and cosy, it’s my pool! I can lie around in tiny bikinis and roll into the pool and splash and play and do handstands and no one’s there to appreciate it except my new hubby? I was sold.

There are many different villa developments and each one is more luxurious than the next. When we contacted a few of them they offered us honeymoon packages and stay-longer specials and threw in massages and meals and day-trips and in the end we feel we got a fantastic deal on the perfect place for us.
It’s in Seminyak, the allegedly trendy, smart shopping/eating suburb neighbouring touristy Kuta and while it’s not on the beach, they do offer free transport around the area. We can go out to shop, eat, lie on the beach, sip cocktails and if the crowds get too much we can just retreat to our private haven. Sounds like heaven to me.

To satisfy BB’s more adventurous needs we’ll visit the markets, go snorkelling and parasailing, take a surfing lesson or two and maybe rent a moped to drive around the island. The last couple of nights aren’t booked yet, so we’ll pack up and try somewhere different then. Go inland to seek out more culture around Ubud in the rice paddies, or take a boat over to the pristine, car-free little island of Nusa Lembongan.

Oh goodness, can we get there already?

Oh, I nearly forgot. The catch.

Apart from the very reasonably priced accommodation, we also found fantastically cheap flights on Qatar Airways. I’ve flown with them before and they are a perfectly good airline. The only little niggle is that their flights are so cheap because they want to lure you into Doha, their capital. So all flights on Qatar Airways go through Doha, and the layover there is usually at least eight hours. When we first considered Qatar Airways, it was widely publicised that the airline will provide travellers on a long layover with a visa and hotel voucher. Perfect! We could spend the first day on honeymoon shopping in their humongous malls or chilling by a nice hotel pool!

We booked our flights. All was set. Then I discovered a few more recent posts on tripadvisor forums describing how only certain passport holders are now allowed to obtain visas to enter Qatar and as usual, South Africans are not on this lucky list. When I phoned Qatar Airways to get confirmation, they told me that we could only obtain Qatar visas by booking accommodation at a four or five star hotel in Doha. Our layover is actually during the daytime, so we just don’t feel it’s worth spending the money on an expensive room in Doha, when we’d be out and about anyway. Not to mention that those Riyals will be worth a fortune in Balinese Rupiahs!

So our first day on honeymoon will look something like this:

Except we can't leave the airport, so really more like this:

Which is not the end of the world, as we’ll finally get to this:

Oh, I feel so much better already.

the wedding: to-do list right now

2008-11-06T11:03:00.005+02:00

I am a spoilt brat.
My life is just about as wonderful as anyone has a right to expect and yet I'm lazy and lethargic when I face my to-do list for the next sixteen days... This is compounded by the fact that I wanted all of this done before 1 November! Lovely bridesmaids and friends are arriving from all over the globe as we speak and I wanted to be free to spend as much time with them as possible!
Alas, it still remains to be done.

Dress: Fetch from BB's Grandmother
Shop for Underwear
Check Bridesmaids Accessories: Monday 17th
Confirm Best Men Outfits
Hotel: Book Friday night
Pay Saturday night & Food deposit
Napkins?
Ribbon?
Okasie: Get final quote & pay
Dancefloor: Lighting organise pick-up and drop-off
Wine: Choose and order white
Photography: Venue scout Thursday 13th
Finalise Shot List
Memorise Vows
Create Play by play
Create Bridal Party / Ushers’ to-do-lists
Create Supplier Instructions
Music: Finalise 3 Play Lists
Check Equipment
Check Veranda & Amphitheatre Sound
Cupcakes: Charly’s Bakery?
Denise Delights: Janine?
Cake stands?
Accommodation: Allocate Twin Rooms vs Double Rooms

I know, I know, there isn't that much to do, most of it is fun and Peonies can not believe that I haven't yet sorted or even investigated the cake situation.
I haven't. I thought I'd just buy some (very delicious) supermarket cupcakes and put them on plates. What can I say, I'm not a big cake person?
But now I'm on a mission to find one hundred 1. delicious 2. affordable 3. beautiful cupcakes to be ready for consumption on 22 November. Plus some gorgeous, individual, bargain cake stands to place them upon on said date. Should be a piece of cake, right? Wish me luck.

Hopefully this is just part of the come-down from the best birthday ever in the whole world? More positive, upbeat, excited post to follow tomorrow, promise. x

go shorty

2008-11-05T08:23:00.003+02:00

i love birthdays.

the wedding: groom’s outfit

2008-11-04T08:25:00.007+02:00

WARNING: GRATUITOUS VISUALS OF MALE HOTNESS PRESENT IN THIS POST!!!

Guilty’s groom Baddie looks so hot in his wedding get-up, even without a head! BB’s look has been coming together quickly now, for which I’m ever so grateful. The man has style and good taste, obviously, but he was so adamant that he won’t wear a tie (of any sort or description) or a suit, and I was worried my dress would look OTT next to his casual cool self.

The tie story, BB owns two. Both are thin, cotton stripy ones that came with striped shirts in the same fabric and you wear the tie loosely. It’s kind of like an anti-tie. So even in his corporate business management line of work, this man refuses to be noosed. How can I then tell him he has to wear a long thin piece of fabric around his neck on our wedding day? I wouldn’t dare. Well, I just don’t care enough for ties.

So I was picturing something like this, and quite liked it.

Okay then I got completely side-tracked looking for my favourite famous hotties in suits without ties…

If only it wasn’t so hot, could I talk BB into a velvet suit?

Or wrap him up in a chic little scarf?

Then my darling BB dropped the interesting tit-bit that he’s also not really feeling a suit either. None of this bothered me in my initial country casual state of mind, but by the time I’d ordered my elaborately glamorous dress and the bridesmaids had gone shopping for black, I was wondering how this would pan out.

We thought about what BB likes to wear out to smart dinners and it’s usually a T-shirt with a smart pinstripe jacket. While I love him in this look, I really didn’t want to be standing at the altar in my fantabulous dress and he’s next to me in a T-shirt? A modicum of formal etiquette should be observed, we thought.

So BB will look something like these dashing men above, except we got him a crazy print shirt and he’s wearing his darkest navy blue Diesels. And grey shoes. And he’ll be a cool, suave rock star. With a wild floral shirt. Sigh, my Beautiful Boy. He is an original.

PS. I'm not going to get political or anything on this momentous day in US history, but this man rocks the no-tie look too:

(gobama!)

the wedding: make-up

2008-11-03T07:01:00.002+02:00

All brides have their own priorities and private excitements when it comes to wedding fluff. You know the stuff that’s completely separate from the fact that you are making a sacred vow in front of God and all the people you care about to remain with one person for life, to love, honour and cherish them and make them banana milkshakes, or whatever? So my favourite fluff is: 1. My dress. 2. The bridesmaids and their outfits. 3. The hair and make-up. 4. The groom and groomsmen outfits. In other words, the fashion. This explains why the dress search turned into such a palaver, and why the following post constitutes my first rant.

I am in the fortunate position of knowing many professional make-up artists in Cape Town, so you’d think finding someone to prettify me on my wedding day would be a cinch. Ha, not so. You see, firstly, November is high season in the modelling industry in Cape Town, which means most fashion make-up artists don’t really do weddings at this time. I totally understand this, as I wouldn’t expect any freelance professional to give up the potential earnings of a five-day catalogue or advertising shoot in exchange for one day’s wedding rate. Secondly, a few of these fabulous face creators are my friends, so if they aren't invited to the wedding, I feel bad asking them work for me and if they are, I’d rather have them enjoy the day as guests.

Then in June I remembered SuperStylish, a friend of a friend (who happens to be my Ex’s best friend’s wife… complicated) who happens to be a brilliant make-up artist and adequate hair stylist. I had booked her for Jewel’s wedding last year and she did a fabulous job on both our faces. SS and I were more like acquaintances, never friends and her relation to my Ex is rather far removed so I was sure it would work out just fine.
I asked her and she replied so enthusiastically, saying she’d be honoured and I was happy as a clam. Then she also volunteered a friend of hers to do the bridesmaids’ make-up. The Friend owed her a favour and was going to drive with her and she was asking very little as payment. I was overjoyed.

In the mean time I saw SS a couple of times at the (Big Name) make-up store where she works. I always went to her when I wanted to treat myself to a little something and even took Nightingale there for a makeover for her birthday. I was excited and looking forward to my trial at the end of October.

Then came 18 September, and with it a message in my Facebook inbox. “Bad news and good news, I can’t do your make-up anymore but will recommend someone else at the same price” was the gist of it. At first I was calm and disbelieving, then it sank in and I was hurt and furious. It was two months before my wedding, two months before the height of modelling AND wedding season, and my “friend”/make-up artist/hair stylist just dropped me. She said that a closer friend of hers was now also getting married in November and as she would also be a guest at that wedding, she’d rather do the closer friend’s make-up. Working in retail, she’s not allowed more than one weekend off per month.

I had complete respect and sympathy for her plight, but this was surely not acceptable? I composed myself before I wrote back. Then I told her how very upset I was, that it was quite late in the day for her to be doing this and that I’d chosen her for various reasons; any old “recommendation” of hers would not do. (Argh, just reading through our mails of that time for reference is making me mad…)
She replied then that she was really sorry, she hadn’t thought of it from my perspective and had assumed that as I know so many make-up artists, it wouldn’t be an issue. She offered to try and take unpaid leave on my Saturday and all could go back to the original plan.

I thanked her and said I’d be ever so grateful, i.e. “It’s the fricking least you can do”! At this stage I was so sad and deflated, I wasn’t even sure I wanted her there on the day? Like a good little trooper I awaited her response, and days later she mails again, “Sorry, I’ve tried everything but I can’t help you out any more”. I cried out of frustration.

A little later I realised time was ticking and I’d better find someone else. I checked out the few girls she'd referred me to. I wasn’t blown away by any of them, they all do a classic “wedding face” and all their brides look the same. Blah. I got a quote from one or two and they were all charging quite a bit more than SS. So much for “at the same price”.
I left it and left it and couldn’t decide what to do. I tried a few fashion artists but as I’d suspected, they were already booked out on wedding / fashion shoots or not available for weddings.

One particularly lovely girl, Coolest, was genuinely shocked at the way SS had treated me, and as she was already booked for a wedding on my day, did her best to recommend other fab girls. I just couldn’t even feign interest. I was completely demotivated and disillusioned. I thought I’d just do it myself. Then Coolest mailed me again one day to see if I had found someone. “No,” I replied. “I can’t be bothered.” Coolest: “Here’s a funny thing. My bride on your day had her wedding cancelled. It’s actually quite sad, the groom broke it off. But it means I’m now available, should you still be interested.”

I know it’s terribly, horribly selfish and unkind of me, but I nearly jumped up and down for joy. Look, if that groom was leaving his bride a month before the wedding he’s no good for her anyway, right? She’s much better off without him, she dodged a bullet. AND I GET TO HAVE A FANTASTIC MAKE-UP ARTIST WHO’S EVEN BETTER THAN SS, AND WHOM I ACTUALLY KNOW, LIKE AND ADMIRE.
Sorry, was I shouting? I’m just really thrilled.

So we had the trial yesterday.

Before:

After several serious acts of magic and illusion:

And then we tested ‘the do’ over copious amounts of G&T’s and me shaking my head around every now and then. To simulate dancing, obviously.

AND she's going to do all five my bridesmaids' faces, just because she's fantastically driven and organised and capable and professional that way and she can, and she's a doll.

I heart Sebastine Pepler.

the wedding: bridesmaids dresses

2008-10-30T14:11:00.010+02:00

In the beginning, I was thinking to dress my five gorgeous bridesmaids in something fresh and informal, accentuating the country element of our venue. The first inspiration boards I loved were white&green or white&yellow. I'd never seen a green or a yellow wedding before! I was considering a morning brunch (to cut costs, which didn't pan out) and would've loved to see my bridesmaids in cheerful, mismatched dresses like these:

They were always going to have different styles of dresses, that was not even negotiable for me. I also love the sense of fun and informality that a print adds, but as we're (literally, atmospherically) a season behind trends from the US and Europe, I couldn't find any in Cape Town.

When it turned into a late afternoon ceremony, I thought something a bit more formal would do. I also realised at this point that my girls aren't 18 year old innocents, they're beautiful grown women. So I started looking for something a bit more grown-up glamorous.

Voracious reading of wedding blogs at this point gave me an overdose of green and or yellow weddings, and the thrill faded for me. I just wasn't ready to commit to colour. Which led me to this perfect picture:

And for those who think frothy little frocks might be a bit more cocktail party than wedding party, I also adore these.

So by now I was thinking grey, and Bombshell in Colorado spotted the perfect little grey dress in my favourite cheapo store, Forever 21. Obviously it would've been a real bargain. Thinking about summer in the countryside though, grey didn't feel quite right, so I started thinking about white. And then I saw this:

Amazing right?
Sadly, coordinating this kind of look across three continents, and still making it just a little bit obvious which one of us is the bride, was more of a challenge than I was up for. I also started worrying about different shades of white, off-white and ivory and how the wrong mix could make some dresses look dirty. Not a good look. Then I found and ordered my gown, which turned out not to be the sheer, simple, understated frock I was dreaming of. Back to the drawing board then and the simplest answer in the world presented itself: lbd.

These are a bit formal and shiny for me, but you get the gist. LOVE a bit of lace in black too...

As proven before, I'm not a big fan of black. But picturing the hotel, the late evening light, chandeliers and candles, my glam dress and BB's rock star outfit (more later) it was suddenly the only option that made sense. It also saved a lot of trouble in coordination and matching/mismatching so I resignedly informed the girls that they're each to find a black dress that they adore, that adores them back and they'd love to have anyway.

books & values: a meme from broke-ass bride

2008-10-30T09:36:00.010+02:00

I've been tagged by my favourite broke-ass bride, so here goes.

First off is the "Bookworm Award".

The rules are as follows...Pass it on to six other bloggers, and tell them to open the nearest book to page 56. Write out the fifth sentence on that page as well as the following few sentences. The CLOSEST BOOK, NOT YOUR FAVORITE, OR MOST INTELLECTUAL!!

Gone With The Wind: page 56. Fifth sentence.

"These people, drawn from many different places and with many different backgrounds, gave the whole life of the County and informality that was new to Ellen, an informality to which she never quite accustomed herself."

Why miss Scarlett, that dress would do me just fine as my wedding gown!

Now we have the "Kreativ Blogger Award".

The rules are to list 6 things you value and 6 things you don't and then pass this award on to 6 people!

6 things I value:

1. Loyalty. In love, in friendship, in business, in life. I've taken some hard lessons in this field.
2. Diplomacy. I don't see why it's necessary to hurt people with truths that aren't revelant.
3. People who laugh easily. I mean, why on earth not?
4. Siblings. A relationship fraught with complexities, but if you get it right so ultimately rewarding.
5. Saying please and thank you gratuitously. It doesn't cost you anything.
6. A good haircut. I had one, once. It was fantastic.

I'm sooo tempted to go this way after the wedding!

6 things I don't:

1. Gossip.
2. Winter. You lovely winter brides make a very good case for it, but I can not be swayed!
3. TV. I've discovered I can live without it! Just don't take my internet away...
4. The postal service in SA. Where are the missing invites, huh?
5. Ex-girlfriends. Still struggling with this one just a tiny little bit.
6. Hot pants. I guess I'm just too old.

Great picture though!

Now I tag:

That [engaged] girl
Dance Floor Tragedy
Baby, picture this
Eight years in the making
Hey, no one's perfect
London Bride

the wedding: theme

2008-10-30T06:55:00.005+02:00

Once we had our venue, we started thinking florists/decorators. As I mentioned before, we only knew one such company who did our friends' wedding and they happen to be considered one of the most innovative, avant garde florists around. Perfect for us then!

We had a meeting with Alwyn at Okasie, hopefully succeeding in illustrating our dream day clearly. We had to write a couple of paragraphs regarding our likes and dislikes, our style and the mood we were going for. It's quite hard to put these ideals into words, but I still like some of the thoughts that came out of that little worksheet.

Overall impression desired: Stylish, unique, romantic, intimate.

Two diverse ideas: 1. Romantic, vintage, classic with a touch of modern glamour.
2. Very clean, modern, simple, minimalist.

Other ideas to incorporate: Contemporary Afrikaans.
Comfortable chic.

Colour Options: white only / white & tiffany blue / white & chartreuse.
No flowers? Just glass/crystal/metallics/candles/beads/ribbons?
Patterns: modern damask/brocade, stripes, polka dots.

Mood / Theme: Contemporary impression of Colonial / Cuban / Deep South.
G&Ts / Mojitos / Mint juleps, white gauze, slow fans, palms.

Favourite flowers:

1. lily of the valley, 2. Hydrangea Blossom, 3. White Peony, 4. white tuberose, 5. Scented bokeh, 6. White petals, 7. White Frangipani Flower, 8. Gardenia..., 9. Oh Sweet Pea!

Preferred containers: Mismatched. Quirky, patterned, coloured, fun.

Other notes: I love chandeliers!

Okasie came up with this fabulous mood board:

the wedding: i couldn't resist

2008-10-29T06:42:00.002+02:00

Ordering some of these from here...
Do you blame me?

Surprise BB!
I love you.
Don't be mad?
x

PS: babypicturethis, it's all your fault!

the wedding: invites

2008-10-28T06:59:00.005+02:00

The very first page I ever tore from a wedding magazine, was this one:

I adore the quirky cute vintage style, which somehow remains quite elegant. I tried making my own save-the-dates based on this one, but that was just ridiculously over-ambitious. Especially considering I only have MS Paint. Eventually, and quite late in the game, I went to see Elsje Designs. Elsje also loved the concept and got to work making it our own.

We had a few hiccups during the process. Finding the right, graphic/iconic images proved much harder than I would’ve thought. There are plenty of vintage images available, and lots of modern ones, but finding a picture that is both at the same time? Not so easy.
Then we also struggled with the font. Elsje found a gorgeous, flawed, inky script that we loved but it came out quite illegible in our text. Then she hated the font we found, saying she’s seen it on every bubble bath bottle and “elegant” menu. This is the kind of input I really value!
Somewhere along the way we lost the part of the RSVP section that gives the date by which RSVPs are due. Oops. It didn't bother me too much as I know people are usually lax to reply anyway, whether there is a deadline or not.
When we approached the end of the line all local suppliers had run out of white on black polka-dot paper and the entire range had been discontinued! I drove around from one paper store to the next, reluctantly settling on silver dots on black for the last batch.
It sounds like about 10 mailed invites out of 90 never made it to their final destinations. That makes me sad… We didn’t print a return address on the envelopes so who knows where they lie now, all forlorn.

Elsje Designs printed the envelopes as well. Originally I thought I’d do that myself to save a bit, but laziness and delay overwhelmed me. I was so happy when we received them though, as the envelopes have sticky strips so no licking required!

I picked the chartreuse colour at random. So far our wedding is basic black and white, which is really weird, as BB and I both love bold colours and our wardrobes are distinctly free of ubiquitous black.

Maybe that’s the problem though, we could never pick just one colour. Our shared favourites are red, apple green, electric blue, and the combination of charcoal & turquoise. My seasonal favourites are lime green, fuchsia and coral. I dare you to come up with an inspiration board that finds the balance there!

one year ago today

2008-10-27T06:43:00.001+02:00

The best thing in the world happened to me.
And it's still happening every day.

The best man for me, asked me to be with him for as long as we shall be blessed to share this world.
And still nothing on this earth could make me happier than knowing this is so.

He is my new best friend.
He gets me.
He makes me smile and laugh, and then smiles and laughs at how much I smile and laugh.

I thank God and every single person I have ever cared for, who ever cared for me, for growing me building me preparing me for this love.

This love that knows no bounds, contains within it such joy and affirmation of all the potential for happiness that lies within a shared understanding, mutual respect and infinite trust.

I love you, my Beautiful Boy.

In honour of the anniversary, some pictures of the ring that crowned the day. Typically, as soon as I was engaged, I saw rings and references to rings everywhere!

coming out of the closet

2008-10-25T06:31:00.003+02:00

I wasn't sure whether I'd ever show our faces, but now I love these pics too much. Our fantastic wedding photographer took these YESTERDAY 24 October and they're already up on his blog. Gotta love it.
Guess I've really done it now!

an interlude: crime, loss and great good deeds

2008-10-24T10:36:00.005+02:00

As you might have realised by now, nothing on this blog happens without a twist. So instead of just ordering the Papillon from the lovely ladies at Designer Loft in NYC, I decided to wait and see what I might find in San Francisco. We were on our way to Pebble Beach Golf Resort for a few days, after which FMIL and I would stay on in SF. I boarded the plane for SF and BB in one of my fab new F21 outfits, bridal magazine in hand, thrilled with life. I couldn’t wait to see my Beautiful Boy! It was the longest we'd been apart since he came home and I can only assure you that absence made the hearts grow fonder and I was ecstatic to be reunited and on holiday with my darling and his darling parents.

We were booked at a hotel on the waterfront and finally checked in at about 4pm. The confusing change in time zones meant I hadn’t eaten anything all day and I was starving. I convinced BB to quickly pop out for a burger before unpacking and meeting his parents for a nice dinner.

We stepped onto the street, a chill wind cooling the sunny day enough that I needed to get my gorgeous leather jacket (a 30th birthday gift from BB) out from my oversized hobo bag. The streets were packed with tourists milling around and the whole atmosphere was festive. Just a few steps from our hotel we found an In-N-Out burger. Cool! I’ve never had one before, and I just love trying out the American standards we always hear of on TV. BB went and ordered for me while I got us a table. When he arrived with my burger, my bag was taking up all the space on the little table so I removed my bag and put it under my chair. In South Africa I would've hooked it on the chair's leg or put my foot through the handle, but I was relaxed, on holiday, in the super security conscious US of A!

I remember I was quite caught up with my In-N-Out burger, it's so good! Much fresher and tastier than McDonalds, Burger King, Wendy's et al. I also hadn't seen my Beautiful Boy in a week, so I suppose I have to admit to being a little distracted by him too. We probably sat there for five minutes, maximum, but it was long enough.

When we got up I looked for my bag, annoyed that it wasn't where I'd left it, and then that cold but hot, calm yet hysterical feeling came over me and being me, I instantly burst into tears. No one around us had seen anything; it had just disappeared into thin air.

We started searching the area, checking rubbish bins and bathrooms and behind tables and chairs... nothing. I remember looking to BB every now and then and thinking, come on honey, you always sort everything out for me, find the bag! But it wasn't to be.

We spotted two police officers just across the road and went to file the report. All the while I'm bawling my eyes out and trying to remember the exact contents of my bag.

My gorgeous shiny purple Marc Jacobs wallet, with money, credit cards, driver's license. Argh, driver's license! What a mission to replace?

My adorable gold Nokia with 500 SMS's exchanged between BB and I during the long distance portion of our relationship! At this a fresh sob escapes me. The officers look concerned.

My BRAND NEW digital camera purchased in NYC the previous day. Damn!

My leather Lazaro makeup bag with my favourite pen, lip balm and memory stick.

The police officer is dutifully writing everything down, minus the adjectives, but to my annoyance he skips the pen, lip balm and memory stick! Although, I might've been mumbling in Afrikaans at some stages.

And then it hits me...

Passport.

I'd hesitated in the hotel room, decided not to leave it there before I'd figured out how the safe works. I WAS AFRAID SOMEONE MIGHT TAKE IT FROM THE ROOM!

Oh.
My.
Word.

Passport includes my ten-year USA visa and (drum roll in my head as the light finally goes on) Mexican visa for next week!

So for the next week, while BB golfs at Pebble Beach with his Dad, I spend my days and nights pretending that I'm not shattered at my losses and trying to replace my passport and visas. These efforts included hours on the phone to voice automated government offices, a flight to the nearest SA Consulate in LA, trips between Pebble Beach and San Jose airport (thank you FMIL and BB!) and a constant run-around between police stations, embassies and travel agents. Not to mention time zone challenges and the fact that I'm at Pebble Beach in the middle of nowhere...
Anyway.

By Thursday BB and his Dad are on their way to Dallas on business, FMIL and I head back to San Francisco and the bad news is confirmed: even with my brand spanking new temporary passport in hand, I can't fly home via USA or the UK! So even if the Mexican Consulate in SF grants me an emergency visa in one day (which seemed unlikely!), all my flights from Mexico had to be rerouted via South America at great expense and there was NO WAY I would see my friends in London.

I'd dealt nicely with the financial/material losses at this stage, but this got me tearing up again. I'd been looking forward to our holiday in Mexico sooo much, it was the highlight of the trip for me, and two days in London was just the cherry on top. It seemed so unfair.

I wasn't ready to give up yet, though; so back in SF I tackled the various institutions once again, trying to get me to fly back into USA from Mexico. At the US Immigration office you're not allowed to have a cell phone with you, so I leave mine with FMIL and arrange to meet her four hours later when she's found us a hotel.

There I am running around SF on the hottest day in boots and jeans, overheating as I'm still trying to sort something out. I stop in at Kinko's to check my mail from the travel agent back home, and on a naughty whim decide to treat myself to two minutes on facebook. I spot a few messages in my inbox, one looks like spam cause it's from a Qasem Alloush? I almost don't open it, thinking it's junk. But the subject catches my eye: your passport.

You can just imagine my sense of wonder, surprise and disbelief as I read that Qasem picked up a passport and he thinks it's mine and a number to call him if it is indeed mine. I write down the number and jump up (almost forgetting BB's credit card there, oops close call!) to call Qasem. Mmm, small problem, no phone! And it's only one o'clock, I won't see FMIL or my phone for another three hours.

Long story short, well shortish: I called Qasem from a payphone, he answered, he was very kind and concerned, I almost cried with relief at hearing his voice, and then he said: he lives in San Jose, and he'd given my passport to the police.

Cue another long story about tracking down the passport at the correct police station. There is the San Jose Police Department, and then there is the San Jose State University Police Department. And the two have nothing to do with each other whatsoever. Then we move on to the chapter explaining how the police had misfiled the passport and denied having it. At this point I'm crying in frustration because now it's so close but still completely unattainable. BB and I both harass poor Qasem at this stage, trying to get as much information as possible about the handing over of the passport.

Eventually FMIL and I can't stand the red tape bureaucracy I'm getting over the phone and we jump back in our rental monster and drive out to San Jose (again). We find the State University PD and I make my case in front of an officer, threatening to personally search every vehicle and office there in order to find my passport. Eventually he realises he won't get rid of me and leaves the building to go look in another office. Five very tense minutes later he appears in the doorway, I look down to his hand, there is a small green book in it.

I nearly kissed him!

The first thing I did back in the car, after hugging FMIL and choking back more tears, was SMS Qasem. His reply was something like "Wow, so you are very happy now?" and the answer is yes, Qasem, I am oh so very happy now.

I know this travel ordeal was a small thing, an administrative nightmare that threatened only to take some pleasure from my trip. No one's life was endangered, no one was injured or ill or starving or living on the bread line. But that's the whole point.

In today's melancholy climate of global warming, economic depression, political mayhem, xenophobia, insane crime levels and every other reason to pop Xanax like Smarties, someone did something nice and decent and considerate, just because.

Maybe it's because he's also a foreigner in the US and understands the value of a passport? I don't know, but the fact is Qasem Alloush changed my life by picking up a passport lying around somewhere in San Francisco, he was smart enough to look for me on facebook (I wouldn't have thought of that!) and considerate enough to not just throw it in the bin when he didn't hear from me.

Thanks to that one act of random kindness, BB and I had the most incredible holiday in Mexico and got to spend time with dearest friends in London. I think that's a pretty big pay-off.

Oh, and to all the facebook haters out there, take that. I love facebook!

And so it happened that we left America, no dress ordered, various boutiques in SF still unvisited. All I had to show for it all was a very organised file filled to the brim with dress pictures, prices, order and shipping details, a lovely tan and a relaxed attitude courtesy of Qasem Alloush and Mexico...

the wedding: dress part 4

2008-10-23T10:31:00.007+02:00

Somewhere in between all the wedding dress shopping I’d spent an inordinate amount of time in Forever 21 and also bought my Boz frames. Yes, the very same sexy red frame for which this blog is named! FMIL told me about this quirky spectacle store she’d found on Union Square when she was in NY in February. Unfortunately, she’d been there on a Sunday and it was closed so she could only drool through the window. I was in the market for a new pair (long story, later!) and said I’d love to go with her and see this shop. Off we went and in we walked and there she pointed out this gorgeous red frame and I loved it, needed it, had to have it immediately. Now she loves telling people how I stole them out from under her, when she’d actually wanted them!

Anyhow, it was our last day in NYC and we started off with two boutique appointments. At Wedding Atelier we had the most charming girl from New Zealand to help us. The shop is pretty and light with huge change rooms and overall just a pleasant place to be. There was a Cymbeline dress I liked, a Chantilly lace sheath (no surprises there) but nothing came close to nudging any dress off the top three spots.

Final stop was Designer Loft and I did feel a quiver of excitement at getting to this store, because they stock Jenny Packham. One of the very first dresses I ever tore out of a magazine and that everyone agreed on, was the Eloise.

Looking through wedding magazines for a friend’s wedding a couple of years ago, I also adored this image. In fact, I still do.

So we arrived at the Loft and though the shop is quite crowded with dresses and people, everyone was so cheerfully loud that it felt like fun straight away. We went straight for the JPs and chose about 10 that I liked. Every dress was mind-blowingly beautiful. I think it’s the soft, floaty, fluid movement of her dresses that I’d been searching for in vain. They are voluminous and full but still hug your frame so you get romance and body-consciousness all at the same time. FMIL and I both had a bit of an emotional reaction to the Manouka. It’s so simple, so airy and clean. We loved it.

We went through the JP rack one last time and the lovely sales lady pulled out one more dress. “Oh no” I said, “Remember I said I don’t want any beading or bling…” She pleaded with me to try it just for her, I was really so well suited to Jenny’s dresses and she’d love to see it on me. Everyone at the Loft had been so kind and complimentary all along, without seeming desperate or false, I figured what’s the harm? So I stepped into the Papillon and came out to the big mirror and saw FMIL’s face. Then looked at my own. Oh goodness. It’s not exactly what I thought I’d go for, but it is a thing of beauty.

EDIT: I am such a fool. I know full well that my darling reads my blog every day... and then I went ahead and posted pics of the dress! Oh well, he claims he didn't really look, but just in case, I've decided to remove the pics for now. Sorry! (You could always google it if you want, but then so could he, so whatever man...)

So, unbelievably, it's now 23 days since my wedding and I can put the beautiful Papillon pictures back up here. I am still in love with this dress.

See, I knew it. I could never have fallen for the sketch, I'm just not visual enough!

It looks okay on the ramp.

It was good for me to see it worn in such a modern, minimalist way.

But this is the mood I totally adore.

And then, spoiler alert, me in it!

Sigh, I wish I could wear it again...

the wedding: dress part 3

2008-10-22T13:54:00.008+02:00

BB was graduating in Madison in May 2008. It had always been the plan that his parents would attend; now it was the 4 of us. BB and his Dad also had to go to Taiwan and Dallas on business around this time and his Dad was taking him (and FMIL and me by default!) to Pebble Beach Golf Resort as his graduation present. They booked around-the-world tickets for them to incorporate everything.

My fab FMIL then convinced her husband that since we were flying out to the US via the East Coast anyway, us girls might as well stop over in NY on the way and then spend a couple of days in San Francisco (the closest big city to Pebble Beach) while they were working in Dallas.

Then BB and I started dreaming of a little holiday of our own to celebrate his accomplishment. We’ve got a long list of places we want to go, Mexico features. Then BB’s uncle told us that he had timeshare in Mexico and we could have a week! Talk about impossibly unbelievably great coincidences. We booked the mammoth itineraries involved.

FMIL and I flew out together; the boys were safely on their way to the Far East. We arrived in NYC, booked into our room and started walking. Now I may have told you what a wonderful person my FMIL is, but I haven’t mentioned yet that she’s also stylish, trendy and a serious shopper like me, be it window – or otherwise.

I came prepared, I’d done hours of research on the Internet and booked appointments in advance at places that had dresses that interested me. We spent four days in the city trekking from outlet wedding warehouse to upscale bridal boutique. My partner was keen, eager, enthusiastic and honest. Thank goodness for the honesty. I tried on at least 50 wedding dresses (we were in NYC damnit and had to make it count), probably more like a 100, and one was as different from the next as anything you can imagine. We visited RK Bridal, Bridal Garden, Kleinfeld, Pronovias, Wedding Atelier and Designer Loft.

With my stubborn conviction that I would find a fabulous bargain within 4 days, we went to the more economical stores first. At RK Bridal you don't need an appointment and on weekdays it's rather quiet so we pretty much had the entire place to ourselves. The racks and racks of plastic-covered paleness can be daunting, but armed with my printouts we went straight for the kill.

I tried on four different Watters dresses, including my beloved Brescia. I am tall and slim and quickly realised what a mixed blessing it is when almost every dress looks nice. They all looked nice. Nice was not gonna cut it though. FMIL was trying to remain objective but I could tell that she thought they were all too plain. I nattered on about fab shoes and blinging jewels to dress it up, she seemed unconvinced but open to persuasion. We left for the next store, Watters prices and shipping details in hand. I figured if the Brescia still haunted me over the next few days, I'd be very happy to marry in it.

The Bridal Garden is a non-profit boutique that sells not-quite-new designer gowns at up to 75% less than the original price. Some gowns are unworn samples donated by stores and designers. I thought I just might find a slightly older simple Vera Wang number here. Sadly, I think you have to actually live inside the Bridal Garden to ever be there when something great comes in. The dresses I tried there were simply outdated and outmoded. Next.

Just before leaving for NYC, I’d discovered Pronovias and lost my heart in a big way. If I was going to take FMIL up on her offer and go for a princess gown, it seemed that this was where I would find it. Their new flagship store had just opened in NYC a block from our hotel, so I bounced in one morning to see if I could get an appointment. The shop is gorgeous to the point of intimidation but the receptionist was so damn sweet and accommodating, I felt more and more sold on the whole brand.

When we arrived for my appointment the sales assistant was sadly not as lovely as the receptionist. She brought out the dresses I requested but didn’t seem interested in our feedback or opinions, she just steamrollered all over our expressed doubts and misgivings, seemingly desperate to make the sale. She was nice enough to offer me the store sample of my favourite dress, which would cut out all the waiting and shipping and stuff, but I just wasn’t convinced.

The dresses were all beautiful in a classic wedding way, but that was my problem. In the Pronovias advertisements and catalogue they style and shape the dresses so that even the more voluminous ones look quite slim and restrained. I’m quite convinced that this is only enhanced by the fact that they are modelled by the world’s prettiest top model Doutzen Kroes…When I tried them on (and as you can see in the catwalk pictures) they are really quite princess poufy.

We told Pushy Sales Lady that we still had an appointment at Kleinfeld’s. She very maturely and professionally trash-talked the stock, prices and sales staff of Kleinfeld’s, which had us scurrying out the door as quick as we could. Pushy ran out after us and shoved a gift bag in my hands. It turned out to be a lovely set of ivory silky pyjamas, thanks Pronovias!

At Kleinfeld’s we had a lovely sales lady, Pamela, helping us. She was kind and patient, she listened. I tried on a few dresses from Lazaro - we were back to the all-over-lace!

These dresses were imposingly beautiful but once again, quite traditional. If the fit was all soft and clingy it might have moved me more, but in reality the dresses were quite stiff and structured.
On the opposite end of the structured scale, I also love Claire Pettibone's whimsical fairy dresses, and got to try one on. It was so pretty, so sweet and frothy. Just a tad too sweet and frothy for me.

Then Pamela brought out an Amy Michelson number. Not the one I posted before, but the new season version of that dress. It’s all slinky and sexy, and it’s called: The Millionaire. What a name! FMIL, Pamela and I all gasped when I stepped out of the change room. That dress is va-va-voom. So glamorous, so look-at-me wow…

I loved it, it fit like a glove. Pamela said it was the first sample, it had just arrived, and we could leave with it. No ordering, no waiting, no shipping, no fuss. Stick it in my suitcase and fly it home. I was so tempted.

Another coffee-fuelled strategy session was necessary. I do not make impulsive decisions people, careful deliberation, that’s me. (Except of course the time I impulsively left my boyfriend of 10 years for a Beautiful Boy…)
Now, the problem with my indecision is that it only gets worse the more choice you give me. So I sat down with my list of shops and dresses and weeded them out. The final contenders were Brescia, Camara (the Pronovias dress with the big beads in two pictures above) and Millionaire. One was sweetly innocent, one dreamily romantic and the other one was sex-on-legs. Three aspects of my personality? Three different weddings? I could picture the Brescia at the ceremony on the veranda, the Camara in gorgeous pictures among the wheat fields and the Millionaire amidst twinkling chandeliers for the first dance.

When in doubt, get more options. I decided to let it all stew away in my brain until clarity came. Meanwhile, there were still two boutiques on my list for the next day!

the wedding: dress part 2

2008-10-20T20:02:00.010+02:00

Luckily for Cape Town brides, the lack of bridal shops is countered by a good amount of fantastic, yet affordable designers. So BB’s Mom told me to make appointments with a few of them, and we’d see what they come up with.

A moment to explain why BB’s Mom in particular became so involved with The Dress: My Mom lives four hours away, which means she’s missed most of the wedding-planning shenanigans. My future mother-in-law is also a warm, funny, caring, understanding, generous, original, creative woman. No buts! I adore her, I can talk to her about anything and I know that I am insanely fortunate to have her as my mother-in-law (to-be).
We were discussing the wedding budget in detail with BB’s parents (oh goodness, there’s another three-part post waiting to happen). We came to our attire and I explained that I wanted something really simple, that I think it’s ridiculous to spend a fortune on a single-wear dress and that I’d be very happy to find something effortless and economical.
When I mentioned my sane, rational dress budget she protested politely. She said that this is the one opportunity I have to wear the most magnificent dress I can find and with the added consideration that I live for fashion, she didn’t want me to be overly restricted by price. So she offered to give me a dress, whichever dress I loved and desired within reason, purely as a gift from her to me, completely separate from our wedding budget. I was overwhelmed.

I assured her that it wouldn’t be necessary, that the things I like are not expensive anyway and that I was completely confident of finding my dream dress within my price range. She just insisted that the offer stood, and I excitedly arranged appointments with three designers.

Our first session was with a young designer, still working to establish herself in the industry. I found her card at a bridal fair in a mall and liked at least three of the ten dresses in her portfolio. I showed her my magazine pictures and told her which ones of hers I liked. She was sweet and personable and the great advantage was that she had a few empire line gowns I could try on. They looked pretty and the general feeling was right, but sadly the quality of workmanship was lacking. Because the cut and fit was not 100%, they were quite unflattering. I was always afraid that the goddess gown styles could make me look bigger, and this seemed to be true. So she guided me back to the more fitted, lacy style I also liked and drew a sketch of a dress similar to this.

We left the appointment knowing that her skills were just not up to scratch quite yet, and while her quote kept safely inside my original parameters, I found it cheekily pricey coming from an inexperienced designer.

The second designer we saw is a Big Name in weddings in SA. He made most of my married friends’ wedding dresses and he is Very Good. The whole appointment was very slick and professional, he asked a lot of background questions and seemed to get a good sense of different aspects of my personality. He also picked up on the fact that I actually still had no firm idea what my dress should look like and he must have realised that we were quite flexible on budget. Thus he proceeded to design a true statement gown.

I’ve never seen anything like it, I couldn’t attempt to describe it other than to say it would not have looked out of place in the Sex & the City Movie wardrobe. It was frilly and flamboyant, with layers of frothy lace, sensational sheer bits and coy covered buttons. I would love to see that dress on the catwalk, but not on me, not on my wedding day. We left distinctly deflated, disappointed that Big Name listened so attentively to all the diverse parts of me and then went to town considering mainly our bendable budget, my need for some simplicity left by the wayside.

Our next discussion was with Karen at Lunar: the perfect antithesis to Big Name’s grandiose overreaction. Lunar is a beautiful local label, see it for yourself at www.lunarlife.co.za. These word-images used on their site is a clear indication of their mood: (SHEER (NIGHT (ETHEREAL (LIGHT (COTTON (NATURE (TOUCH (BONE (SHIMMER (SKIN (TEXTURE (LOVE (GHOST (EARTH (FROST (WHISPER

By the time we went to see Karen, I’d started playing around on the internet and had fallen head-over-heels with a super simple silk chiffon sheath from Watters Brides. Brescia is completely understated, innocent, unassuming, light and breezy, effortless, with just a touch of sensuality from the back. I still adore it.

The best pictures of the Brescia can be viewed at http://watters.com/dress_popup.php?showid=715&id=2.

So I showed Karen all my references and made it clear that I did not want an over-designed showboat of a dress, just something simple. She designed a very beautiful, flowy, elegant improvement on the Brescia and quoted a fantastically good price. BB’s Mom and I went for coffee to dissect and discuss.

Out of all the dresses I’d tried on and the ones that had been designed for me, I definitely liked the Lunar dress best and the price was perfect. The only problem was, I could not make myself commit to a sketch. I am not an incredibly imaginative person and not very visually inclined either. I desperately wanted to see my dress in 3D, feel its texture and its flow, see it move and experience its weight. I could not be sure that the Lunar dress would feel right, would look special or glamorous enough. My indecision was debilitating.

BB’s mom was very patient and understanding, giving me time to talk it all through and try and discover my true wish. And then she said “Why don’t we stop over in New York on the way to BB’s graduation, and see what we find there? There will still be enough time to come back and order the dress from Lunar, so if we don’t find anything, we’re still sorted.” The woman is a genius! So with a little twisting of BB’s dad’s arm and a lot of excitement on our part, we started planning a dress-shopping trip to New York!

the wedding: venue pictorial

2008-10-17T10:39:00.006+02:00

By public demand! These are my very amateur pics, it's even better in real life.

Cute walk street right across the road

Veranda

Lounge

Dining area

Terrace

Garden

View

Amphitheatre

the wedding: dress part 1

2008-10-17T09:36:00.009+02:00

A lot has been said on my favourite wedding blogs about sane prioritising, rational financial planning and reasonable wedding attire. I’m a lover of fashion; I’ve been working in it, dreaming of it and obsessing about it all my life. So I guess it makes sense that my dress ended up being my most significant wedding element. I cringe at the financial implication of said dress and it is in many ways a very unreasonable dress, but I proclaim my innocence, members of the jury. I was under the influence of the Big Bad Mother-in-Law-to-be.

This is how it went. I tore dress pictures out of my magazines and compiled a wish-list in my super organised wedding file. The first dresses I liked were all Grecian, empire line goddess gowns.

Like I said, I love fashion and if you look at this year’s best-dressed Oscar gowns it’s obvious that this was the trend a la mode.

Looking around dress shops in Cape Town though, you’d never know that there were any bridal styles other than princess poufy and mincing mermaid. Not to be rude.

But then I guess I need to go back further and explain that there are only about 3 bridal dress shops in Cape Town. Seriously. The ready-made gown to try on and then order in your size market is apparently an untapped goldmine down here. I got so excited when I saw posters advertising a big wedding chain from Johannesburg opening here in May, but by March the posters were down and the shop never came. What a letdown.

So I made an appointment at option 1/3, The Wedding Box in Tyger Valley.
(Incidentally, I e-mailed, phoned and left messages about six times before I got a call back and could then only get a Saturday appointment months later…)
The Saturday came and my Sis / maid of honour and two BFFs / bridesmaids living in SA met me at the Wedding Box a couple of minutes before our allotted timeslot. On the door of the tiny little non-descript shop was a sign that read: “Bride being pampered, please don’t disturb”. That sounded good. We were ushered in a while later and I was ready for the pampering to begin.

By this time, we’d chosen the Royal Hotel as our venue and it’s colonial vibe had inspired me to fall in love with a very different kind of dress, the Oscar de la Renta kind.

So the very reason we were at the Wedding Box, was that they had one dress on their website that reminded me a little bit of the De la Renta. I explained to the Box lady that I loved empire line, and alternatively was considering slinky all-over lace.
I tried on a very sweet, basic chiffon destination-wedding-type dress, an unadorned empire line in charmeuse and then the colonial lacy number.

The tiny, grey office-like space held no illusions of luxury, glamour or pampering, my assistants were squatting on the floor in the corner and being told be quiet when they got a bit excited, and the lady was rushing me in and out of the gowns. Despite this cold and clinical scenario, my girls still got a little bit emotional when I came out in the lace gown. The idea was beautiful, and I’m pretty sure that if I were in the actual De la Renta at this point, we’d have been sold. (To the devil, for eternity, to pay back Mr. de la Renta...) But the lace was a bit stiff and the neckline a bit high. It just looked that little bit too old-fashioned for me.

I got quotes for the chiffon and the lace gowns, while the lady insistently inserted veils and tiaras onto the page. Whatever lady, I told you I ain’t wearing no veil! I must say that the prices were very good. Both of them were well under my very conservative, sane dress budget, in fact I could’ve bought two of the chiffon ones!

But we knew that we hadn’t found my dress, so the search continued.

Option 2/3 was a local designer who used to make dresses for hire, thereby owning quite a large number of ready made dresses. I popped in one weekday afternoon on my own and the designer and her shop assistant were kind and sweet and made me try on dress after dress. Some were cute, some were almost there, and one was dead sexy which got me thinking about another dress I quite fancied…

Shop 3/3 is a vast old dinosaur of a bridal salon in the heart of the city centre. I ran in with BB one day when we were in the area and we giggled at the endless rows of predictable, boring, outdated, over-beaded, over-tulled confections that hang there like sad little ghosts of weddings gone by…

And that was it for shops where you could actually just go and try on a selection of gowns. A dead-end street for this picky gal.